In this room inside this house, i feel neutral.
Nothing feels stimulating or engaging, but nothing worsens my anxiety either.
The white wall and cold colours of the room, the scent of cashmere woods, the ever so frigid air, how everything is organized in a specific manner, the almost sterile level of cleanliness, the silence in which you only hear the ringing in your ears, the comfortable and nice amount of natural light that shines and envelopes the room a tone of cerulean because of the curtains. All of this never changes, not even the routine or actions.
Even in this permanently neutral environment, the thoughts and anxiety still manifest themselves since they never go away. The difference is that i'm constantly working, listening to music and distracting myself hence i don't hear them as much.
Even so, there are still occasions where the anxiety is far too much to cope with or the thoughts continue to tell me everything is going to end miserably, there's even the occasional moments where i see, hear or feel something that isn't real.
March 18th, 2018
YOU ARE READING
In My Head
Non-FictionJust a place where I let the thoughts, ideas, tragedies, events and possibilities that thrive within me and the experiences I've lived be voiced and bear a place where others may understand them. •lower-case "i" intended •Cover made by me *Warning:...