Heroin(e) | DISCONTINUED

Chapter 7

As I'm standing against her closed door I sigh and think to myself. This didn't just happen, it couldn't have. But it did. It was more than real and I was too caught up in my thoughts to actually experience it. It wasn't the right decision to leave her like that. I want to go back in and kiss her again but I shouldn't and I highly doubt she'd actually want me back inside. I sigh again as I start walking and kick a wheelchair, she's making it even harder for me than I wanted it to be. I need to get my mind off her for now and decide to go up to the roof.

I walk around in the chilly but sweet midnight air, thinking. I hang my arms over the railing, letting them dangle over the edge. My buzzer hasn't gone off again, I'm guessing -or more, hoping- she went to sleep and we can talk about it tomorrow. "Hey, you alright?" I softly hear behind me and I pull my arms back, turning myself around and leaning against the railing. Courtney is standing there, looking at me kind of sad. I nod. "Mhm. I'm fine." I try to sound as convincing as I can. "You sure? Willam said she saw you kick a wheelchair?" She says with a chuckle which makes me crack a smile as well. "I'm fine, I promise. I'm just tired I guess." I shrug and Courtney tilts her head. "You know I won't believe that, right?" She tells me as she positions herself next to me, the same sad look in her eyes. "It's something about that girl isn't it?" She suddenly asks and my heart skips a beat. I nervously shake my head, not wanting to look at her. "Oh, please. What happened?" She impatiently asks. "Nothing! Nothing happened!" I quickly answer with an awkward smile.

"You know you can tell me, or Willam. Even Trixie, she's too shy to run around and tell people about other's secrets." Courtney tells me, almost like she's trying to squeeze it out of me. "I know, but nothing happened. Just.. Personal stuff, that I'd rather keep to myself." I answer her with the sweetest smile I can fake and she finally just shakes it off. She heads back inside and I inhale the soft midnight breeze. I might tell Trixie. I need to tell someone but honestly, who can I really trust around here? I push myself away from the railing and head back inside as well, going back to my own floor. The hallways are dark and silent and they give off a kinda creepy vibe. I slowly walk through them back to my station. I've never liked dark hallways, staring into them has always made me uncomfortable. I'm finally at my desk again and I grab my cup to get another cup of coffee. "Nurse?" I suddenly hear and I let out a high pitched scream, covering my mouth immediately as I turn around.

Raja is standing in front of me with her walking iv, looking sad and pouty. "Don't do that!" I yell-whisper. "And why aren't you in your room?" She crosses her arms and frowns at me. "I rang the bell a hundred times and you still didn't come!" She says to me, her voice a little too loud. I softly shush her and look at my buzzer. Ah, it didn't go off because its batteries died. "I'm sorry. Go to your room and I'll.. be there soon, okay?" I say, she nods and turns around to walk to her room. I head to the canteen to get a cup of coffee and 2 new AAA batteries for my buzzer. I see Court, Willam and Alaska sitting at the table as I walk in. "Hey guys," I say to them and they greet me back. "Come sit with us honey," Alaska says to me and smiles. "I'd love to, but I'm needed somewhere right now." As I finish my sentence I can see Courtney raise an eyebrow at me which makes my cheeks turn a rosy shade. The other girls nod and smile at me and once I get my coffee and batteries I head back.

I walk straight over to her room and knock on the door. I hear a soft 'come in' and I open the door. I close the door behind me once I'm inside and walk towards her bed, pulling an adjustable stool closer so we're the same level while she's sitting on her bed. "Why did you leave?" She doesn't even give me the time to speak. I just look at her dumbfounded, really not knowing how to respond. "You know you can't just do that, right? I work here, if people find out it can cost me my job." I eventually manage to get out. "But it's night, no one will find out." She asks me and I chuckle at her innocence. "You don't know how my colleagues are, they'll find a way." I say and lay my hand on hers. "I'm.. not saying I didn't like it, though." I softly mumble, just hard enough to be understandable. Her eyes shoot open and she has that same twinkle in her eyes. "You did?" She softly asks as her lips curl into a smile and I can feel her fingers intertwine with mine. I nod my head and look at our hands.

All she needed was a little bit of attention, that little bit of interest. When I look back up at her she's still looking at me, but the look in her eyes has changed to a much more.. desiring look. She's not afraid to take action as I see her leaning in. I put my cup on the nightstand next to her and bring my hand up to her face to stroke her cheek. I lean in as well and partially open my lips. I close my eyes and before I know it I feel her soft lips pressed against mine. I lift myself up from the stool slightly to kiss her better. I feel her lips opening and granting my tongue excess. My tongue snakes inside her mouth and softly fights over dominance with hers, mine wins. The only sounds you can hear are lips smacking and occasional escaping gasps. I pull my lips apart from hers and I can hear her whine and whimper for more. "Oh, you want more, baby? I've already given you more than I should." I whisper as my lips graze over the soft skin of her neck. I can feel her skin heat up and her body twitch. "But-" I cut her off by pressing my finger against her lips.

"If you'll be a good girl and go to sleep now, I'll visit you first thing when I come in later. I promise." I say and press a kiss against her cheek. I pull myself away from her and watch her lie down on her bed, cuddling herself up in her blanket. I lean in and give her a kiss on her forehead, "Goodnight." I whisper and quietly head out the room. I check my watch and see its almost 7 am. My lips form a smile as I walk back to my desk, grabbing my stuff and walking to the canteen where the three girls and Violet now, too are still sitting. Willam is staring at me and I'm nervously smiling back. "I don't know what you're doing, but you're having too much fun and I want to get in on it!" She says to me and I chuckle. "You'd love that." I tell her with a wink.

We chat a little about our days and wait for the other nurses to arrive to switch with us and at about 6:58 Katya walks into the canteen. She embraces Alaska, gives her a kiss and greets the rest of us. I get up and change into my normal clothes before giving Courtney and Willam a hug and say goodbye to the rest. I walk out of the building and head towards my car to drive home. On the way home I softly hum and tap my fingers onto the steering wheel, enjoying the soft morning air. This is the happiest I've been since a long time, and Trixie's gonna love this tomorrow. I should be careful though, if Violet finds out I'm done for. But that girl's worth it, so very worth it.