Anxiety; Cashton AU

fünfzehn (part one)

{ i really do apologize if my smut was bad lol and this chapter will have two parts }

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"When I was over at Ashton's last night, I did some thinking." And some other things. My subconscious adds, I can't help but smirk but soon come back to reality.

"I'm going to be mature about this and I'll stay here. If Cade makes one wrong move, I'm staying at Aislynn's, okay?"

My mother nodded frantically, "Cal, I'm so proud of you for handling this like an adult, you have no idea how much this means to your father and I."

I licked my lips before nodding and getting up to go to my room, "Wait mom, when is he getting here?"

She fiddled with her thumbs, "In about two hours." Okay, I'm not gonna lie, I'm mad because she could have at least told me he was coming so soon!

Instead of causing a scene, I walked up my stairs, taking as many deep breaths as it took for me to calm down. I really need to calm down, I can't have an anxiety attack right now. 

"Breathe Calum." I told myself as I lay back on my bed, kicking my shoes off in the process.

My phone started ringing from my bedside table and I mentally groaned for not putting it on silent. Nonetheless, I rolled over and retrieved the device.

"Hm?" I answered.

"I love you." My eyes widened at Ashton's words. What was happening right now? 

"Pardon?" 

"I- I knew I shouldn't have said it! I'm such a dumb ass." He rambled on.

"I mean, uhm," I took a deep breath, in order to not get worked up again, "I guess it's not too early so . . I love you."

"Calum, are you saying the truth, because I don't want you to feel obligated to say it back."

I chuckled, "I do love you too, Ash. I think that blow-job was too intimate to not be love." I heard him giggle over the phone, "Please don't add 'too' after you say it. It makes me feel like you're just agreeing and I don't want that."

"I'm sorry, I won't. Hey, I gotta go, my brother is coming home today." I groaned.

"That's fine, call me before you go to bed, yeah?"

"Wouldn't miss it, I love you."

"I love you, boyfriend." I chuckled as I hung up and decided that I should at least look decent for when my brother gets here. I'm not doing this for him, though. I'm doing it for my mother.

I decided to put on music while I was getting ready because I discovered that if I listen to All Time Low when I start to feel anxiety coming on, it calms me down. Them and Twenty-One Pilots.

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"Hi, Cade." I say in the tiniest voice ever, looking at my worn out Chucks on my feet.

"Calum! Long time, no see!" I put on a fake smile.

"Can I get a hug?" He ask and I freeze and look to my mum for help.

"You know, why don't we go sit down and have a nice chat." I mouth a thank you to her and follow Cade and her into the kitchen.

"So, how are things in the ole' Hood household?" I didn't like the way he said Hood Household. It was like he was impying that he wasn't a member of this family. 

"Good, what about yourself?" My mum asked. I didn't like this at all. I had an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Well, actually, you see . ." There's that feeling. I knew something was up.

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