Forbidden Love | Reylo Fanfiction

42. Intoxicated

"I've found the answer." He whispers.

I look at him, blankly. What does he mean? If he had found the answer already, why had he let me talk about trying to find it? I was almost angry, I feel like I've been tricked. But I hold that thought and compose myself.

Although I was confused at what he said, I look into his eyes and I see a glisten. Hope. His eyes are sparking, filled with hope. Bright stars, shining. And so are mine, I can't see them but I know. These four words that he has just said have given me so much hope. More hope than the resistance have ever given anyone, and that's a lot of hope. Hope just spilling out of all the damaged cracks. But still, I stand there. My face blank and I'm confused. What does he mean? Was it here, in an ancient text buried deep within a cave? What was it?!

"Be-"

"Shh." He whispers, interrupting me and pressing his thumb against my bottom lip. I freeze, not in fear but in shock. I knew what was coming. We pause, looking into each other's eyes. I swallow and hold my breath. Please. Please let this be. His eyes search mine and he leans into me, his lips drawing near, my lips parting to receive them. He stops inches away, his eyes drift down to my lips as though he is savoring the moment. I want to slap him, tell him to stop teasing me and get to it but I also want to savour this moment. I want to remember this Ben.

The moment our lips touched, the world vanished instantly. Nothing else mattered. Not the base, the planet, the two forces fighting against each other, not even the galaxy mattered. All that mattered was this. This perfect moment. My eyes fell closed, and all I could feel was him. His warmth, his touch, his being. It was agony, knowing that this was the first real time we had just kissed, most likely the last, and only time that we could share this experience. My heart ached when his hands cupped my cheeks and pulled me towards him, taking in this final embrace, this kiss of death. This would be the death of me. I wasn't stupid. I mean, I was. Letting him do this to me wasn't what I should have wanted but I did. My whole body craved more, craved him, but it couldn't last. It was just for now, and I couldn't take it. Soon I could feel tears stinging in my eyes, and when he pulled away for air, I pulled him back in. I was intoxicated—I was intoxicating him, but it didn't matter. Nothing would matter after this. He'd just leave me again, I knew that. I wasn't stupid. But something felt different. This time, I wanted him to stay.

My heart is pounding as my hands tangle in his long black hair, pulling him as close to me as I can. This was not what I expected to be 'the answer'. This wasn't expected at all but I wasn't about to complain. I wanted to remember this moment. Remember how his lips taste, remember how soft his hair feels in my hands and remember how I feel. This was magical and I didn't want it to end. I really hoped it wouldn't but I had to pull away. I had no other choice, after all he took my breath away.

As we parted I looked up to him, my eyes scanning his face for any sign of regret. But to my surprise, I couldn't find any. Just a sweet smile set on his lips. My lips curved to a smile and I leant into his chest, his arms wrapping around me. "Thank you." He whispers into my ear, brushing his lips against my ear. The touch tickles my ear, making me squirm a little at his touch. His breath is warm, heavenly. I shiver as his voice echoes in my ear.

The sound of his heart is steady, a thump followed by another thump. I can feel his chest vibrating, pulsating. It's nice to hear it, I feel connected to him. "For what?" I ask, leaning into his chest and holding him tight. The heat from his body is radiating off, keeping me warm. I hear him sigh and I pull away slightly to look back up at him. "For this." He smiles, kissing my forehead. I want to cry, not with sadness but with happiness. This is a moment I would die for. A moment that I wish I could just freeze in time. Forget the war, forget politics, forget the force. Just let it be us.

I pull out of the hug and tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear, looking up to him. "I should go, it's late." I say, looking around at our surroundings. It's dark, really dark. I had watched the sun set with him and I hadn't even really noticed it, just him. It was like all our surroundings had disappeared, it was just him. All him.

He nods, gently. "Let me walk you back." He whispers, gripping my hand and squeezing it, softly. I smile at this gesture and squeeze his hand back. I hear a light chuckle leave his lips and his hand hold onto mine tighter. We start walking at a slow pace. My heart is glowing, I feel so floaty. Like I'm walking on air, I'm floating, I'm flying. I know that I'm beaming like an idiot, like a child receiving candy. But I can't help it. I'm so happy. And then I wonder, what are his thoughts? What is Ben thinking? In some ways I'm tempted to enter his mind, look at what he's thinking but I know that isn't fair. It's rude and it could ruin everything. And so I don't. But it does leave me wondering. What is he thinking?

Does he want this moment to last forever?

AN

Sorry for the slow updates, I'm awful, I know.

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