My Silenced Cries

A letter to the people in my life.

This is a letter... To many people. You can pick what lines were meant for you. Because of you feel guilty then, maybe it was for you. There are a fe that apply to multiple people. But I'll let you figure all that out.

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Dear people in my life,

Why am I so nice to you?

I cant be mean, ever.

I'm so terrified of hurting people's feeling that u never speak my mind.

No one ever knows how I feel about them.

Or the situation.

I jut shrug my shoulders and say I don't really care.

When it means the world to me.

I think it's because I would rather people figure it out on there own, because that would mean so much to me.

Maybe I think people are smarter then they really are.

Maybe I just need to stop getting my hopes so high...

Maybe I just miss you too much and that's why I'm in so much pain.

Maybe I shouldn't have taken that drink, looked into those eyes, or finished reading that text.

Maybe I like to hurt.

Like I'm addicted to pain, maybe it's like a drug to me.

I can't get enough so when I'm happy I force myself into something sad.

Maybe I just don't deserve to be happy.

Maybe I don't think I deserve to be happy.

Maybe, maybe I should just stop complaining and do what everyone else wants.

Maybe I should stop thinking of others as much and think of myself.

But maybe I shouldn't.

Maybe I should stop overdosing.

Maybe I should stop thinking about death.

Maybe I should write more. Get my mind off things.

Maybe I should stop caring as much, maybe that would help cause less pain.

Maybe I should care more about letting people know how I feel.

Maybe I should let the voices take total control. They're almost there anyways.

Maybe I should give into the blade. Let it take my life and everything in it.

Maybe just maybe, I should push forward.

Forget the voices and stand up for myself.

Look you in the eyes and tell you how I really feel.

Maybe this is all a trap.

Maybe I'm too scared and weak to stand up for myself.

Maybe it won't be worth it in the end. Maybe it will.

Maybe my issues will get in the way of everyday life and I won't be able to live anymore.

Maybe I'll get so sick of being pushed around and stepped on that I'll just push every one away.

Maybe I'll have some big epiphany and realize exactly what I want.

Maybe I'll die fighting.

I know that having this much stress in my life can't be good for me.