One Shots

Forever Yours

Stained glass patterns porcelain

Your watercolors running

All your paintings are fading from the walls

Miss, I miss the way you breathe

The way you twitch in your sleep

Your smile, your straight teeth

And the scars along on your cheeks

Camila laid in bed staring at the ceiling, her thoughts going back to her mistakes. She could only breathe as she knew her eyes were watering, but no tears dared to come out. It had been years, and yet she was still here breathing.

She moved her hand and touched the cold bed, she closed her eyes wanting to feel warmth but nothing had came. She should have known her mind was so deep in the gutter not even a single thought of her brought warmth. 

She missed her. Her breathing. Her touch. Her smile. Her laugh. She missed Lauren. 

"Please come back," Camila choked out but no one came. No matter how much Camila begged. No one came.

Oh, oh, I should have wrote that letter

You looked beautiful in white but I stayed home, oh

Could never live without you, but I guess I'll have to

You're gone, gone, gone

Camila seemed to stay in her room, only going out to use the bathroom, to eat, to do daily errands. But to go out and live life? Camila rather stay home.

All she did was write.

She wrote her heart away, her feelings away, her thoughts away.

If someone were to ever come, all they would see is pages and pages of paper on the floor and bed. Never to be picked up by Camila.

All with the same heading, Dear Lauren, all with the same ending, Yours truly, Camila.

The ring never leaving Camila's finger. Almost as if she had glued it on. The dress on the door never touched since the day she walked down the aisle to find everyone in tears. 

She never learned how to cope with the pain but writing to Lauren seemed to make everything okay.

But Camila knew better, she was not okay. She never will be okay, no matter how much she writes, no matter how long she waits, no matter how long she breathes.

She will never be okay.

All the promises, vows under the covers

We would play pretend my love

But it was real to me

Now I waste my days away

I know I can't recover

There's no love lost, but I'll be forever yours

Camila continued to write, writing about the day Lauren had given her hope for forever.

She smiled.

It was the first time she had smiled. She smiled when she remembered Lauren confessing everything she was feeling, the nerves, the love, the happiness, the forever. 

But then the smile went away, for Camila remembered that Lauren never really did accomplish that promise.

Instead, she left Camila. She left her alone in the world. She grew angry, she wanted to blame Lauren. She wanted to be angry at Lauren but she couldn't.