chapter fifteen

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TRIGGER WARNING. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Time: 2:10 A.M.

I can't sleep.

All these thoughts keep going through my mind.

Thoughts Of what this world would be like without me. How happy Coralie would be.How happy Ace would be. and you know, I really don't have anyone to talk about this stuff. Tyler and Sara have a perfect life, they wouldn't understand. But really, what is the point of my life? everything that once made me happy is all gone. I really have no reason to be here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
Time: 4:02

Dear whoever finds me,
I am sure you are now traumatized from seeing my now dead body. I am sorry for how ugly I am. I can only imagine how much worse I look dead. But my looks aren't the point of this final letter. The point of this letter is an explanation.
First up, Ace. Thank you, Ace. for letting me see the real me. how ugly I actually am and how much of a whore I was for screwing every guy in my way. Thank you, for shoving me against lockers and kicking me down and making me feel like an unwanted pet or a cockrach that was just always in your way. Thank you. My life would've been so much better without you. You are one of the reasons I am dead. I hope that thought eats you alive.
Second, Coralie. Thank you for making my father happy before you had him killed. Thank you for ruining my joyus spirit I had. I love how you hurt me and blamed me for everything wrong that happened to you. I am so thankful for all the bruises you put on my body and all the cuts you slit. You were supposed to be my mom's replacement. you had one job: to be a mom. And you couldn't even do that. Thank you for being another reason I was in pain all the time. And no, You do not get my house of my inheretance.
Third, Tyler and Sara. Thank you guys. I really love you two. You guys helped me a lot. But not enough mentally. Thank your mother for me, for opening her home up to me. Thank you Tyler for giving me the thrill of my life at the races. Also, thank you for protecting me when needed. Thank you, Sara for being the sister I never had. I love you to pieces, girl. Don't cry over me, please. You are absolutely gorgeous and you deserve the world. And you two, I want my inheretance to go to you two. You guys may also have my house. Take good care of it. I love you both.
Finally, The students at school. Thank you for not caring enough. Next time you guys just watch someone get bullied, You might think. I hope my suicide has a huge impact on the piece of sh*t school.
Now. I can literally hear the whispers saying "She only did that for attention." No. I didn't. I did it because my life is actual hell. Live a day in my life and you'd kill yourself too.
~Anna

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Time: 6: 24.

I'm still alive. for now. I have been reflecting my life. But now. I think it is time.

Tyler: Hey, need a ride to school?

No. Not going today.

Why?

I have something to do. You probably won't ever see me again. Tell Sara i love her. I also love you. goodbye.

Anna, what are you talking about? I'm coming over right now.

Tyler, I am fine.

I don't care.

I ignored Tyler and started doing what needed to be done. I changed into my favorite dress. Its a pale yellow and it is very light weight and flowy. It stops about at my knees. If I was going to leave this world, I at least needed to look decent.

I filled the bathtub. While that was filling i grabbed a shaving razor and began to take it apart. Once i got a blade out, I sat down into the water.

Here I go. This is the end.

The end of all the pain and suffering.

This is the begining of happiness for Coralie and Ace and everyone else who hated me.

I made two cuts on my wrist. As the tears flooded down my face i just continued to cut at my right wrist. Then my left. I dropped the blade on the outside of the tub.

I began to feel light headed. I stared out the bathroom window. I looked at how beautiful the sunrise was. Now that is true beauty.

I sunk myself into the water, holding my breath.

I started to feel myself slip away.

But suddenly I was pulled up. And my body wasn't the thing that pulled me up like the last time.

"Anna! What..." It was Tyler.

I began bawling. Tyler pulled me out of the water and onto the floor. He held me. I could also hear him crying. But I couldn't stay awake much longer.

"Tyler," I croaked.

After that everything went black. Maybe I was hallucinating or something, but I swear I heard the words I love you.

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