Inevitable

Chapter 40

Jess's P.O.V.

I pace around my living room deciding how I should tell him. I'm playing with the end of my hair and whispering to myself. My phone vibrates sending butterflies into my stomach. I have never been so scared in my life. I can't handle being without him. If he rejects me I'm done for. I look down to my stomach and move my hand across it. I can't do this on my own. But, I will for my baby. I will do anything for the child growing inside me. With or without Zayn. I hope it's with, but its foolish for me to think that he will be happy about this. He will be anything but happy. I will be known as the girl that ruined Zayn Malik's career if He stays with me. I will be hated by many and loved by few. Those few are all I need in this world. He would resent me for the rest of his life if I made him stop his career. I would never, ever do that. I wouldn't change anything about him.I would let him travel the word and meet his adorning fans. I wouldn't take that away from him, the boys, or their fans. 

A knock sounds at the door and I frantically try to unlock it, My fingers fumble around with the lock. I finally take a deep breath and gather my thoughts. I open the door and see him. I smile at him and step aside for him to walk in. He smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes. I close the door behind me and turn around to face him. I walk to him and wrap my arms around his waist. He stiffens and wraps one arm around my shoulders. He breaks the hug all to soon and turns to sit on the couch behind me. I follow him and sit beside him.

"Hi, uhm, how was the interview?" I ask him shyly

"It was alright, I guess." He's acting cold and distant. He hasn't even tried to grab my hand or even touch me for that matter.

"What's wrong Zayn?" I narrow my eyes on him.

"Nothing really. One of the boys was reading these stupid quotes online and one really stuck out in my mind."

"Okay? and what was it?" I ask confused by his answer.

He looks at me with stone cold eyes. "The worst thing about being lied to is knowing that, to that person, you weren't worth the truth." He hisses.

My stomach is in my throat and I now know why he's acting like this.

"Zayn... I need to tell you something."

"Oh, do you now? Then let's hear it."

"Uhm, I'-I'm pregnant Zayn."

He looks at me emotionless. He already knows. How the fuck does he know. I know Rhenn told Michael but she swore he wouldn't say anything.

"I know. This is old news."

"H-how." Angry tears fill my eyes.

"Through the grape vine of course. You told everyone before me Jess." He is on his feet now.

"I di-"

"Don't you dare lie to me!" He screams inches from my face. His fists are balled at his sides and he's towering over me.

"You told the rest of the boys you were pregnant before me! How could you do that!? That's my fucking baby Jess!"

"Zayn! For shit sake's I didn't tell them!"

"Just stop!"

"I would never tell any of them before the father of our child! How dare you think so low of me!"

"You're ruining everything Jess! This is my career on the line here, you know that right!? I can't just give everything up to sit at home with you and the baby! I refuse! I can't miss out on life because of this...This mistake!" 

Tears are falling from my eyes, very word he speaks is full of hate. I'm literally being torn apart by him.

"Mistake?" I whimper.

His eyes soften for a split second and then go back to full blown anger.

"Yes Jess, this is a mistake. That-" He points to my stomach. "Is a mistake. It never should have happened." His voice is lower now, not quite a yell but sill raised. He walks towards the door and I stand in his way.

"Are you fucking kidding me!? After everything you said to me. After how you told me that I was your dream girl, your everything. You're going to leave because I got pregnant! Pregnant with your fucking child?! This is not just my mistake Zayn. WE DID THIS TOGETHER!!! How could you use the word 'mistake' so loosely!"

"I-"

"No Zayn, get out! GET THE FUCK OUT." I yell through sobs and tears.

He yells and punches the wall next to my head. I yelp and flinch away as the wall pieces fall to the ground.

"Fuck you, Zayn Malik." I stare up at him through my lashes. "I hate you."

He looks pissed and shocked. He yanks the door open and slams it shut.

That was a lie, I didn't hate him. All the emotions come rushing to me and I grab my stomach and sink to the floor. I bury my face in my hands and sob. I cry so hard I can't catch my breath. I get up and throw my phone across the room making it shatter against the wall. I stumble into Rhenn and I's room and kick the door open sending it slamming into the paneling. I rip all the pictures off the wall and smash them on the ground. Fuck him. Fuck Zayn Malik. How could he call his child  a mistake like that. He said he loved me and that he would always want me. He lied. Guys lie Jess. Guys lie. He didn't mean anything he said. I meant nothing to him. Absolutely nothing. I crawl into my bed and kick off my shoes. How could he say that!? I punch the pillow beside me and throw my face into it.  I cry myself into sleep. Still choking on tears every once in a while. Tears soak the fabric of my pillow and stain it black. Black like his heart.