The Phan in Our Stars

Part Two

"Oh my god, Phillip! You are too cute!" Rosie laughed as she wrapped her arms around Phil's waist from behind, kissing the back of his neck. "Swear to God, you are too precious!!"

God. It had only been two weeks since Rosie had pranced into Dan's life and the list of things he hated about her was already extensive.

1. She always called Phil "Phillip". Like, always.

2. Literally always.

3. Her fake laugh which vaguely reminded Dan of Professor Umbridge.

4. Her extensive use of the word "precious".

5. She pretended to know things about things that Phil liked (i.e. Pokemon) that she really knew nothing about

6. That fucking accent

7. Phil was hers.

Dan was still mostly in denial of the last one. Yes, okay, there was no denying the fact that Phil was her boyfriend. Dan felt like he couldn't go anywhere without her popping up. She was in their flat 24/7, and she was literally ALWAYS touching Phil in one way or another, whether it was holding hands or hugging him, kissing him, laying on him. But that didn't make him "hers" per say. He was still Dan's best friend, even if they had barely spoken since their fight.

Dan really did feel terrible about that argument, but he couldn't find a time when Rosie wasn't around to apologize to him. So here he was, two weeks later, still barely talking.

And, to make matters worse, Phil and Rosie were having sex now. Dan had tried to deny this as well at first. He could remember the first time she had gone in his room since the day they had met. They were in there for a long time. A long, long time. And when Rosie came out, she looked disheveled and left immediately without saying goodbye. He had tried to write it off as her being rude and told himself that they had just been cuddling and her hair got messed up. But after three days of this behavior Dan decided he needed to find out for himself. He hadn't entered the room, but he didn't need to. He could hear perfectly well exactly what was happening on the other side of the door.

Dan had just stood there, stunned, his heart slowly forgetting to beat, his breath shaky, and stared at the wall. He was too paralyzed to move, but was too horrified to stand there and listen to what was happening on Phil's bed, so he walked, zombie-like to his room and lied down on the bed, not knowing what to do. That had been four days ago.

Now, as Dan watched her hug him from behind, his entire body burned with anger and jealousy. He hated Rosie. Hated her. And what made him hate her the most was how genuinely happy she made Phil. When she walked in the room, his eyes lit up; when she kissed his cheek or held his hand, he would smile and blush; even now, with her arms around him, he smiled like a big, love-struck dork.

"How are you so precious?" she asked, following him into the lounge where Dan was. Phil sat on the couch next to Dan, but leaving a cushion between them, presumably for Rosie. Despite the blatantly empty seat, Rosie opted to take her seat on Phil's lap.

"Oh, Rose!" Phil said, giggling and blushing like an idiot, "I'm not all you make me out to be."

"Oh there you go again, underestimating yourself!" She said, kissing his cheek, "You really ought to give yourself more credit! You're so cute and strong, fighting this so hard," she placed a hand in his cancer-filled leg, "and all your success with the video thing."

The video thing.

Rosie might have been able to understand the trauma and pain of cancer, but one thing she did not understand was YouTube. It annoyed Dan so much the way she talked about it. She acted like it was child's play, always commenting on how Phil should get "a real job". Dan could see in his face that this annoyed Phil as much as it did him, but neither of them ever said anything.

"Thanks, beautiful," Phil said, running a hand through her long, blonde locks. She had curled her hair today. Dan wondered how long those curls would last.

"Now whose giving too much credit?" Rosie said in mock denial of his compliment.

"Oh, Rosie, don't say that! I think you're very pretty! Hey Dan," Phil acknowledged his friend's presence at last, "Don't you think Rosie's pretty?"

Dan pretended to be very interested in the Pokemon rerun he was watching. "Um what was that?"

"I asked if you think my darling Rosie is the prettiest girl on earth!" Phil caressed her cheek with the edge of his finger.

"Oh, yeah, sure, she's beautiful." Dan said, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Oh you flatter me!" Rosie ignored Dan's response, "How do I have the sweetest boyfriend ever?"

"How do I have the most amazingly beautiful girlfriend ever?"

"You're cute."

"You're cute!"

"No, you're cute."

"You're both adorable okay?" Dan said, annoyed.

"You are the CUTEST!" Rosie said, completely ignoring Dan and planting a kiss on Phil's mouth.

"No you are," Phil said quietly, kissing her back.

"Oh my god, do you have to do that here?!" Dan asked maybe a bit too angrily.

"What?" Phil asked, breaking away from Rosie and looking over at Dan.

"I'm still here in case you forgot," Dan snapped.

"So?"

"So? Do you have to do that right here? It's disgusting."

"Dan, why are you being so rude? What's gotten into you lately?"

Dan fumed with anger, "What's gotten into me lately?? What's gotten into YOU?!"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know, it's just that you're always so.. Ugh just never mind!!"

"Right okay, that explained a lot"

"Why don't you two just go get a room or something??" Dan asked, almost raising his voice.

Phil just stared at him, aggravated, but Rosie sat up and said, "Yes, Phil! Why don't we get a room?" She winked at him suggestively. Dan felt his stomach begin to tie in a knot again. He felt sick to his stomach. Why did he say that? Why did he have to freak out all the damn time?

"Rosie--" Phil began.

"Come on, Phil!" She nagged, pulling him up by the arm and half dragging him toward his room.

Dan stood up and walked towards the door. He didn't feel good and he didn't want to witness what was about to happen in their apartment.

"Dan? Where are you going?" Phil asked, pulling away from Rosie.

"Out."

"Out where?"

"Just out," Dan grabbed his jacket from a hook near the door and left without turning back.