Elisabeth

Chapter 9

Chapter 9





"Everybody knows what is going on, Elisabeth." A voice in her head said. There was no "everybody" on this island as far as she knew. But she couldn't deny that she was a little afraid of the voice.

"Don't worry Elisabeth, you did the right thing, you know." Another said.  Elisa turned around. She wanted to scream 'Shut up!', but she didn't. There were enough reasons not to, and there was only one to do. The reason to scream, was to get rid of the voices in her head. The reasons not to scream, were all waiting in a queue to be mentioned. First, and most important, was that a loud scream could wake up lots of scary creatures and they sure wouldn't be happy with that. Second was she would wake up Will, and she certainly didn't want that because of reason number three. And reason number three was that Will already thought she was crazy. If it wasn't for this forsaken island, she would already be stuck in an asylum for lunatics. She didn't want him to be afraid of her, or even think she was crazier than he already thought she was. She kept telling herself that she shouldn't worry about what he thought, that she didn't mind his chuckles over her. But she did. She really cared about what he thought of her. 

"Look at yourself, thinking of him again, aren't you?" She bit her lip. Maybe she was insane. Maybe having voices in your head wasn't one of the most normal things on earth. However, calling her a lunatic would go too far. Right? 

"Oh please, it wouldn't. He is just using you, like Beau. They both knew you were insane from the moment they met you. They are using you, Elisa, using you. Using you. Using you. Using you. Elisa, you're so stupid, they are using you. Using you. Elisa. Elisa..."

 'Elisa!'  Elisa opened her eyes. She found Will staring at her. 'Are you okay?' Elisa blinked.

'Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be. Why did you wake me up?' She tried to maintain a distance, she couldn't really forget about her nightmares that easily. Last time her dream came true. As in: she had imagined someone on the beach in her dream. Of course she hadn't prayed and wished for someone to strand on this island.

Alright, there was no use in fooling herself. So what if she did? Was it that wrong to want some company when you were all alone? She certainly didn't think anyone deserved to be stuck on this island forever. But when she thought only about herself, she knew company was one of the best things you could get when you hadn't talked with another human being in three years. 

'You were making weird noises, fell out of bed and you are shivering right now.' Will said. 'Why won't you just admit that not everything is alright?' Elisa kept her mouth shut and gazed at her fingers. Her lips were pressed together in a long, thin line and her eyes stood a bit stubborn, angry and maybe a bit sad. 'It's not that hard, Elisa. And I won't blame you for it. Everyone has nightmares.' He put an arm around her. 

'Why do you want me to trust you so badly?' Elisa snapped at him. She slapped his arm of her waist and stood up. She regretted it right away, as it had been so warm and comfortable. All she really wanted was to snuggle next to him with his arms around her and fall asleep. But she couldn't. Who even invented babies? Sure they were cute and they were the future and all those things, but she just wanted him to comfort her without getting pregnant. She ran away. 

"You know you want him to sleep by your side." 

'Shut up.' She whispered.

"You told him to leave earlier this evening because you knew he was hard to resist..."

'Shut up.' She whispered between clenched teeth.

"You just want it so badly, Elisa. So badly..." Why did this voice keep... stalking her? It was her own mind, making fun of her. Was even her mind betraying her right now? She climbed in her tree and sat down on the thickest branch, facing the ocean. The moon's reflection was sparkling on the water. It seemed so calm. So quiet. She lifted her eyes to the moon. It had something magical. It almost felt like her parents were staring at it as well. Right at this very moment. It made her feel good, that even though she was so far away from them, they were yet so close. She came here every night to experience the feeling, and the moon never let her down. 

'Elisa...' Will bend through his knees and breathed heavily. Almost like he ran all the way. She turned her head to see him climbing in the tree. Her tree. 'Why can you walk away...'  He let out a deep sigh to regain his breathing pattern, '...and can't I? Same island, same rules would have been fair.' She dried the tears that she hadn't noticed until that moment, and looked at him.

'Maybe because I come here every night and I know this island better than you do?' 

'Of course you do. But I was worrying.' Her eyes softened as he made the remark, but quickly recovered. 'What if you were stung by some insect?' Elisa rolled her eyes, something she had learned from Beau. 

'I'm not stupid enough to get stung, William.' She called him William just to annoy him, which he didn't really appreciate.

'And I am?' Everything was silent. He rolled his eyes in return and shook his head. 'I am not that stupid.' He said, moving closer to her. She moved away from him as he did so. 'Elisa, why can't I sit next to you?' Again, she kept her mouth shut. 'Elisa.' No move. Then he remembered something from earlier that night. 'Are you still afraid I'll get you pregnant?' He smirked. 'Elisa, you won't get pregnant from me. It... it doesn't happen until we both really, really want to. You won't get pregnant if I just hold you.' Elisa ignored him and kept staring at the ocean.

'What's this?' He asked after a while, pointing at a lot of striped carved in the tree. She didn't answer. He took in her beautiful face. The moon was reflected in her eyes and her hair wasn't gold anymore. It now seemed.. silver. Her lips, which he couldn't help but notice were looking so soft and kissable, were relaxed and she did not seem tense at all.

'You're not worried at all. You just don't want to talk to me now, do you?' This was when she turned her face.

'No. I do not want to talk to you. And no, I don't want to get pregnant.' He took her hand. 

'Elisa, why won't you tell me what the stripes are?'

'They are the days.' She whispered. Her eyes seemed so glazy and he could see she bit her lip again. She did that a lot. 'Every stripe stands for one day here. Every stripe stands for one day without my parents. Every stripe stands for one day...' She shut her eyes, and let a tear roll down her cheek. He wrapped his arm around her waist and moved closer. He pushed her head softly against his bare chest and felt her shaking. She didn't care if she would get pregnant. She just wanted him to hold her. She just needed a hug. Beau had never even touched her, unless it was extremely necessary.  She knew he had held her before, but it wasn't the same. Back then, when they were swimming, she hadn't really thought of what could happen. Right now, she knew what could happen. Even though she didn't want to, she had to tell him. She didn't know why, she just felt the urge to tell him something about her. Almost like he deserved it. Which was completely insane, because he had no right to know anything. But still...

She looked up at him, still leaning against him and repeated the last sentence. 'Every stripe stands for one day...' He looked down into her eyes. 'Alone.' 

He tightened his grip on her and leaned his chin on her head. She could feel his lips moving against her hair.

'Trusting me would make everything so much easier, Elisa.' She could feel him looking at her. Even though she felt she had to tell him something, didn't mean she should tell him everything. She had no intention of telling him the whole story of her life. Nor the whole part that was about Beau. She had promised herself to stay strong in front of him. She had already trusted one person too much. Two would really pass the borders.
If you were already stabbed in the back once, what would a second stab do?  

'Why won't you  trust me? It's not like there is someone else you can turn to.' Nor was there someone else that could hurt her so easily, she thought. Will's eyes met hers. 'What do I have to do to make you trust me?' Elisa knew the answer. Finally an easy question, something she could answer without having to think about it.

'It's simple.' He raised his eyebrows. 'You leave this island with me, or we stay here together.' He relaxed.

'That is indeed easy, Elisa. How could you even think I would leave you alone?' It made her feel special, the way he ridiculed what she had said. But you never knew if devils could act.

'Promise.'

'Promise what?'

'Promise me you won't leave me on this island. Promise me we will leave together, or stay here together.' He smiled. Beau hadn't taught her about the world, and other people.

First of all he could at least have taught her how babies were made, as he was a doctor, and second he could have told her that promises weren't worth anything in the real world. Sometimes she still seemed to think like a little girl of six years old. He did not blame her. And he would certainly not leave her alone on this island. Not ever. Will didn't want to admit it to himself, but he couldn't fool himself. He was in love with this girl. And not like he "loved" all the women that wanted him for his money. Elisa was real love, because he wanted to kiss her everytime he saw her. He wanted to hug her everytime she touched him. And he was actually interested in her, he wanted to talk to her. He wanted to catch every word she said, put it in a box so he could open it every time he felt sad. That was why it was real love. All the girls that ever kissed him, werent even close to making him feel the way Elisa did when she talked to him. He just wanted to comfort her small, fragile body and dry her tears. He just wanted her close, he couldn't stand seeing her cry. He took off his bracelet, which was a braid made of leather.  

'I promise.' He took her hand and put the bracelet around her right arm. His grandfather had gotten it from his grandmother. When his grandfather had been dying, he had given it to him. He could still hear him tell:

"This bracelet, William, is only for special people. And not just special people, but the most special person in your life." He should have doubted before giving it to her, but he didn't. Will wanted Elisa to know that she was special to him, and he would never leave without her.

'Thank you, Will.' She whispered. She knew the bracelet meant something to him, because you normally wouldn't give someone a bracelet when you promised something. Would you?

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Well, I hope this chapter is actually longer than the other ones, as it was my intention to write a longer one. Did you think it was sad? I was kind of trying to make it sad, so... I'll update soon again, keep reading ;) 
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xxx Suzanne