My Muse || Sope

-Fourteen-

I groaned in pain as I rolled onto my side, trying to use my frail arms to help me off of the ground. I was almost up when my body gave out, colliding with the ground once again, making me let out a soft cry. I tried once more, forcing the pain inside, something I had become quite good at, and pushed myself up. I stumbled slightly as my head was pounding. I coughed up some more blood, hunching over while doing so. My whole body was sore. Jungkook was a muscular guy, after all. I wiped the bloody saliva off of my chin with my sleeve and limped to the door of the studio. I turned to face Jungkook, who was currently being hugged tightly by Hoseok, who had hardly paid any attention to me, despite the brutal beating I had received from the youngest. I cleared my throat, earning a glare from Jungkook. "I, uh," I rubbed the back of my neck awkwardly. "I'm sorry you're hurting too." I spoke quietly before limping my way out of the studio.

Namjoon stopped me during my attempt at escaping, gripping my scarred wrist. I winced in pain as I faced him. His eyes went wide when he saw what was probably a very bruised face and black eye, and blood covered teeth. "Dude, what the hell happened to you?"

"Nothing. Did you need something?" I felt bad for being so bitter towards Namjoon, who did nothing wrong, but I was just in pain and was frustrated at the situation.

"Uh, just giving you your latest project." He handed me a manila folder with a dimpley smile. "All of the details about the project and deadline are inside."

I nodded before walking towards the door, headed back to my apartment to clean myself up.

Luckily, Taehyung was asleep on the couch, surrounded by the tissues used to dry his tears. I made my way slowly to the bathroom, carefully locking the door. I looked at my appearance in the mirror, rolling my eyes. Jungkook really fucked me up. I have a split lip, a cut on my cheek, a swollen eye, which definitely has the potential to be a black eye, and a few bruises on my cheeks and jaw. I grabbed the first aid kit under the sink, grabbing some antiseptic for the cuts on my lip and cheek. I winced as it stung my pale skin, although not as much as it did the first time they interacted with one another.

I heard a few knocks on the door, and I froze, hoping that Taehyung would give up and walk away, but I was wrong.

"Yoongi? You've been in there a while. Are you okay? Also, I need to pee."

I chuckled at Taehyung's cuteness as I closed up the first aid kit, placing it back in it's home under the sink before I unlocked the door. I kept my head down as I whispered a quiet apology, praying he wouldn't stop me.

"What's on your face?"

I groaned before turning around, facing my best friend, flashing a weak smile when he saw my wounded face.

"Who the hell hurt you?" He touched my skin softly, examining all of my cuts and bruises, a frown evident on his face.

"Uh, just some guy on the street on my way home. It's nothing, really."

His eyes narrowed in my direction before he took his bottom lip in between his teeth, nodding slightly. He turned and entered the bathroom, locking the door behind him. I was almost in my room when I heard him shout, "don't forget to put ice on your eye to help with swelling!"

••••
I called in "sick" the next day, my body still sore from colliding with the ground yesterday. Taehyung decided to go into work today for the first time, despite me not being there. I would send him a text every half hour or so to see how he was doing. He would reply with short responses, but so far he seemed to be holding himself together.

I had just gotten out of the shower, applying a fresh bandage to the cut on my cheek, when the doorbell rang. I threw on some clothes quickly before rushing to the door. I wore no emotion on my face when I saw Hoseok standing on the stoop, a bag in his hand. He smiled sadly at me, not saying anything for a moment.

Once he realized that I wasn't going to speak first, his smile completely faded. "I, uh, heard that you were sick and decided to drop some lunch off four you. Taehyung said that you like ramen, so I brought two different flavors of ramen, and some lamb skewers."

I inhaled sharply before opening the door wider, letting him enter the apartment. He gave me a small smile as he walked into my kitchen, setting the food down, slowly taking it out of the bag. "I have beef, chicken, and shrimp ramen. Which do you want?"

I shrugged. I felt a little bad for being so silent, but deep down I was still mad that he didn't pay me any attention yesterday. I'm sure I was overreacting and just being petty, but it hurt to see that I wasn't as important to Hoseok as I had believed I was.

"Chicken." My voice came out surprisingly quiet. He smiled brighter as he passed me the chicken ramen and a bag full of lamb kebabs. I couldn't help but smile when I took the first bite.

Hoseok must've noticed as he chuckled quietly before shoving some ramen in his mouth. He swallowed, using a hand to cover his mouth as he began to talk. "How're you feeling?"

I rolled my eyes slightly. "Just fine and dandy."

He scoffed, pushing his food away slightly. "I'm trying to be friendly here, Yoongi. Lose the fucking attitude."

I pressed my lips together before taking a bite of the delicious food. "Why are you really here?"

"Why am I here? To check on you! To see how you were feeling! To be a decent human being, unlike you!" He slammed his fist on the table in rhythm with his last few words.

I felt tears stinging my bruised skin as I looked down once again. I remained silent. Silence is what I'm most known for. I let it consume me as I quietly cried. "E-e-excuse m-me." I stood up from the table and escaped to the bathroom, letting my emotions take over. It wasn't the first time I've been called a shitty person, but it still hurt like a knife to the heart every time.

My fingernails dug into my skin as I cried, my body shaking rapidly at the intense release of emotions. I haven't had a meltdown since the last one at the studio. A lot of emotions had built up inside of me, begging to be released.

•••••