Bashing Brains - Ellis X Reader

19

Be safe, be calm, be nice. They'll protect you! They'll protect you cause you're carrying five medkits, seven adrenalin shots, two bile bombs, and a defibrillator! They wouldn't just... leave you to die. I kept on thinking to myself, biting my nails as yet again I refuse to even consider carrying a weapon upon me. I really shouldn't have to kill anything because we had such a large group we could even take down a tank and a single second because of all the rounds of ammo we would fire into him.

I was carrying all the supplies that we came across, having everything on my body used as a pocket. It was a lot better than having to worry about who to kill next and what to say when I'm already freaking out that I've killed a total of four people that were alive. Then there was an extra one that I feel no remorse as I saw him die... I considered myself, emotionally unavailable as you can say about me currently.

It was good that we have the girls in our group now and they were being just as protected as me. I worried that since I was murderous person they would probably discard me in a single second if they could. That's the whole reason on why I decided to start wearing all of the supplies. We didn't need them, but it was helpful when the time came to use them.

I chewed on my fingernails, bringing them as bear as I can, it was not a pretty sight but I couldn't break the Habit as I was feeling a little bit anxious of everything that was going on. It just didn't feel right that I was still here, like I wasn't supposed to be continuing on my journey with them because I was slowly losing grasp of everything that was happening around me.

Ellis noticed my odd behavior, taking his way towards me and sitting a hand against my back as we scooched on in the middle of the group. "You okay?" Ellis questioned.

"Y-Yeah... perfect." I muttered to him, pulling my fingers out of my mouth.

"Please, yew' don't look so good." He started again, making me wish we would find a safe house soon enough.

"I'm good!" I laughed, but since it seemed faked I sounded more insane then giggly. "I'm just... a little... tired." I added, brushing down my hair as it was in a friz.

"Are yew' sure?"

"Ellis-"

A horde of zombies came down the road that we were traveling on. Definitely wasn't the time to talk as I cowered between the crowd and let everybody else deal with the infected clutching onto the medical supplies just in case if anybody needs it soon enough... hopefully not.

Ellis wacked a zombie that was getting to close to me, I scrunch up into a ball partly as I didn't want or wish to see the blood and chunks of brain matter flying around the whole damn place here.