What's Wrong With Us? {Cashby}

45| To New Beginnings (The End)

Alan's POV

"Are you serious?" I asked him.
"Dead serious. If you want to leave we'll leave. I want to be with you and I want to be happy with you. We can't do that here so let's go." I smiled at him and lept across the center console to kiss him hard. It felt like forever since I had felt his lips and I never wanted to kiss anyone else besides him.
"We need to get some stuff." He said as I pulled back and sat back down in my own seat.
"My Dad goes to work in like an hour I can sneak in and get some of my stuff. Yours shouldn't be too much of a problem should it?"
"Not at all. What do you want to do until then?" I thought a moment before I came up with an idea.

~~~

I stood outside of the therapy building and took a few deep breaths. Austin was right beside me holding my hand. We started up the steps and once we got inside I let go of his hand and walked towards my usual room. I walked inside and saw everyone sitting in the same circle as usual. Gerard, Frank, Kellin, and Vic all gave me surprised looks as I walked in. Kellin looked like he wanted to jump out of his seat and hug me but somehow he restrained himself.

"Well well it's nice of you to join us Mr. Ashby. Where have you been?" Mrs. Adams said crossing her arms.
"Trying to press charges against your granddaughter for rape." I said being blunt and she gasped. "But don't worry nothing is going to go through. That's not what I'm here for though, I have something to say." I looked around the room at all the familiar faces. The people I had spent most of my weekdays with and the people I had grown so close to.

"I want to say that this," I spun around in a circle. "Is a bunch of bullshit. None of it matters. You are who you are, no matter what anyone says. Whether you like girls or guys, or both, whether you like neither, whether you like girls clothes, or whether you're transgender, it doesn't make a difference. You are you and your gender or sexuality does not define you. You are who you are and each one of you are absolutely amazing. I don't know what sick and twisted mind has you in here but never let this woman tell you you're a piece of shit. None of you are less than perfect. I hate this place but I don't think I would change coming here. If I did I would have never met such wonderful people and I would have never met the love of my life." I motioned Austin over and he took my shaky hand in his. "You guys won't be seeing much more of me but promise me you won't let this place or these people bring you down. Promise me you'll always be true to yourself and take their words with a grain of salt because I mean it each one of you are perfect in every way."

I took a moment to look at Mrs. Adams who was staring at me with wide eyes, I sent a little nod her way and looked around at the people in the group. Everyone was silent for a moment but it didn't take long for Kellin to attack me with a teary eyed hug. He held me tightly and soon everyone joined in forming a gigantic group hug. We all broke apart but I made sure to hug Kellin a little longer.

"I'm leaving." I whispered in his ear. "I have to get out of here." I felt him nod against my shoulder.
"I'm going to miss you. Once I turn 18 I'm coming to find you. You're my best friend Alan. Please keep in touch." He said and kissed my cheek.
"You know I will." I sent him a smile and pulled him in for one more hug before linking my hand with Austin's once again.
I turned back towards the group and sent a smile their way.
"Bye guys."

~~~

I stared up at my house and took a deep breath before I used the spare key to unlock the door. My Dad's car wasn't in the driveway but my Mom's was. I heard the tv on in the living room so I snuck by as quietly as I could and started up the stairs. I let out a breath of relief once I made it safely in my room.

It was weird to be standing in the place I grew up knowing this would probably be the last time I was ever here. It was weird but relieving in a way. Lately this room didn't hold the greatest memories and I was happy to leave it all behind. I took one more glance around and then pulled the two suitcases I had from under my bed. I stuffed in clothes and other things I found necessary. When I had finished that I grabbed both of the suitcases and started for my door.

To my surprise it opened before I could even reach the handle. I froze and watched as the door opened, revealing my Mom.
"Alan?" She questioned and looked between me and the bags I held. "Honey, what're you doing?"
"I'm leaving." I said and shrugged my shoulders. There was no reason for me to try and lie to her.
"Alan," she said with wide eyes. "You're leaving? Why?"
"I don't want to deal with it anymore. I hate being here. I can't be who I really am and it's not like you'll miss me anyway."
"Alan that's not true." She protested, crossing her arms.
"Mom don't even try to play dumb with me. I'm not stupid. I know how you and Dad feel. It's okay but I can't stay here."

"Alan you're my baby...you can't just leave!" She said in a low voice.
"Do you really think I want to stay here?"
"Why wouldn't you?"
"No one accepts me for me Mom or did you forget that? Did you forget how you and Dad sent me to some fucked up therapy because I'm gay? Did you forget how Dad hit me? Or how you just let it happen?" There were tears in my eyes now. "Did you forget that parents are supposed to be supportive? They're supposed to help their kids grow and love them endlessly, but that's something you and Dad have seemed to forgotten."
"Alan please don't do this!" She said as I tried to move past her in the doorway.

I stopped and stared straight at her. "Can you accept me? All of me."
"Alan...I..." Then silence
"That's what I thought." I nodded and shoved past her. I practically ran down the stairs and didn't stop until I was safely in Austin's car. He took my hand and then kissed me gently before throwing the car in drive and glancing at me.
"You ready?"
"I'm ready."

Well guys we've reached the end (don't worry there is going to be an Epilogue). I would just like to thank each and every one of you for sticking with this story. This last little bit had been hard and I've had a hard time writing because I honestly didn't see why it mattered. It was something I loved doing but it did it really matter? I was in a slump and it took me a little bit to realize that as long as it mattered to me it mattered. Then seeing you guys commenting saying you couldn't wait for an update and just hearing how much you guys actually enjoyed this story it made it matter even more. You guys are seriously the greatest and I appreciate you guys reading and commenting and voting so so so so much.

Now we can all say that this probably isn't the best ending but it felt like the right place to end it on. This is how the story was going to end all along but I didn't expect it to end so soon (just like every other story I've ever written). But I hope you guys like it and I hope you stick around for the epilogue.

Now there's one more thing to take care of.  If you've been around a bit you've probably noticed that once I end a story I start a new one. Usually I've already picked out the story and have pre-written a few chapter however this time I haven't got that far, so I'm gonna gain a little help from you guys. I have two possible story ideas for the ones I want to do. Now the other have titles yet or a properish description but I'm gonna put them below and you guys can vote in the comments on which one you would like me to start next!

1.) Alan has most of his adult life with a man who he loves dearly. He loves him so much that he doesn't even mind the bruises that he leaves after he looses his temper. Alan is sure that the only person who could love him is the one he loves right now but what happens when he his love gets a little too angry and throws Alan and his younger brother Kellin out into the street where they get mixed up into some gang trouble?

2.) How would you feel if you were scared of everything? The spiders that occasionally crawl across the ceiling. The thunder that booms loudly in the sky. Even your own shadow.
Alan is terrified of everything it seems. He's scared to leave his house and that's troubling for his parents. So they decide to set up a sort of 'play date' for their son and the boy across the street.

Thanks guys! I hope you are having an amazing day/evening/night!💕