What's Wrong With Us? {Cashby}

16| Imaginary First Dates

Chapter dedicated tooooooo
@3_00alien
💞😜💞😜💞😜💞😜

Alan's POV

Austin pulled me out of the building and led me over to his car.
"Wait, my Dad's in there. He'll kill me if he finds out I left."
"So? Tell him I took you. I am your counselor." He said and shrugged his shoulders. He motioned me to get into the car and I glanced back at the building before getting in and buckling up.

We drove for a bit before Austin spoke up.
"So where do you want to go?" He asked and I just shrugged my shoulders.
"Somewhere quiet."
"Why quiet?" He asked as he turned down a street.
"I've got a few things on my mind." I said dismissively. He didn't say anything else, he just kept driving. I stared out the window and wished today had never happened.

I wish I could pick apart my Dad and Mrs. Adams minds so I could understand how they thought forcing me on a date would help. If anything it just made me feel worse. I didn't want her touching any part of me, I didn't want to talk to her, and I definitely did not want to start a relationship with her. I felt absolutely no attraction to her and I never would.

It blows my mind that they actually thought this could work. Sitting a person in a room and forcing them to interact is never a good idea. It's ridiculous, it-
"Hey?" I heard Austin say and I turned towards him. "Don't think to hard." He said and I noticed his hand was lightly rubbing my thigh, in a comforting way. "We're here by the way." He removed his hand from my thigh and I looked out my window to see the lake. The place was deserted and I couldn't help but smile a little.

Austin's POV

I walked over to a dry patch of grass and sat down, waiting for Alan. It was extremely weird being around him since my dream but I had to get him out of there right? He was about to start freaking out, especially since that girl decided it was her job to help Alan out. That was my job, literally.

Alan sat down beside of me and pulled his knees to his chest, staring off at the lake. After a while of silence I broke it.
"Are you okay?" He just nodded and I looked at him as he stared off. I was desperately trying to find differences between him and the person in my dream, the problem was that they were exact copies. The plump lips and light freckles on his face were exactly the same. I sighed and fell back on the grass.

Alan looked at me. "Are you okay?"
"I should be asking you that."
"You did though." He pointed out and I just nodded along. "You don't really think I should have stayed back there so you?" He asked quietly after a bit.
"Well..." I thought a moment. "I think you should hang out with chicks some more, but I don't agree with forcing you on a date." His face fell slightly but he didn't comment on anything.

After a while I was getting tired of the silence so I stood up and held my hand out to him. "Let's go get some food."
"Okay." He said simply and took my hand allowing me to pull him to his feet. I didn't realize until I got back to my car, and finally let go of his hand, That I had loosely held it all the way back. It was probably just out of instinct but I couldn't shake the nervous feeling it gave me. Alan on the other hand didn't seem fazed.

It bothered me that I had so casually held his hand like that. It was something I wouldn't normally do, especially with a guy. I wanted to reverse time and change what happened but then again I wanted to hold his hand again...for some reason. Maybe I just needed to get into a relationship? Was I just missing the comfort of having someone to call mine? My hand itched, for an unknown reason, to reach over and gently hold his.

I drove absentmindedly, preoccupied with other thoughts, with a destination in the back of my mind. Eventually I pulled into the parking lot and shut the car off.
"I've never been here before, what even is this place?" Alan asked as he unbuckled.
"It's a really awesome diner, to be honest I usually take all my first da-" I stopped myself, not believing the words that were getting ready to come out of my mouth.

"You usually take who?"
"Nothing." I shook his question off. "Just come on. I'm hungry." He didn't question me anymore, just followed me into the diner and sat across from me in the red booth. A waitress come over and gave us menus and took our drink order.
"Get whatever you want and I'll pay." I said, words just coming up out of my mouth.
"You don't have to do that."
"Oh don't worry. I want to, well...I mean,..I don't mind dude." I mentally cursed myself and just focused on the menu. I peeked over the top of it to see Alan with a confused look on his face, he glanced back up at me and I quickly looked down. Get it to-fucking-gether Austin.

We ordered and no matter how many times I tried to force my eyes away from Alan they always ended back on him. I watched him stir his straw around his drink aimlessly as he stared out the window. He was biting his lip gently and looked deep in thought. I placed my hand gently on top of his, to get his attention of course.
"You okay?"
"I'm fine Austin." He smiled at me and glanced down at my hand on top of his. I quickly pulled it away and wrapped it around my glass before pulling it up to my lips and swallowing a drink.

Our food came shortly after and even then it was like I was in a trance. It's like Alan was an exhibit in some museum that I was fascinated with. He took small bites and chewed them more than enough, always making sure he never had any food on his face. He clutched his napkin tight and he fidgeted in his seat. I took notice of his slightly disheveled hair and the rose color his cheeks had. I looked at his eyes next. The light caramel color brown that they had and that's when I noticed he saw me starting. His blush deepened and mine formed as I quickly looked down at my plate and took a bite of my food.

What is wrong with me?