Saving You

13//The Storm Part 2

Chapter 13

"A sad thing in life is that sometimes you meet someone who means a lot to you only to find out in the end that it was never bound to be and you just have to let go."

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{Rose's P.O.V}
I stood in an amazement not knowing what to do or what to say. I don't know if i should break his heart and say 'No'. Or say 'Yes' and hurt him more. At that moment i didn't know what i should do. Should i listen to my heart or should i listen to my mind which is telling me to free him and let him go? I guess we all know the answer to that question. I guess we all know "That somethings are not meant to be". I guess i know the answer but i can't just bring myself to say it out loud. I just have to say it at some point of my life.

"Ian......I....I.....d..o...n...ot.....know.." I muttered. Everytime i look in his eyes, I feel that words are just stuck on my tongue. I can't look into his eyes. I can't stand seeing his expression after i break his heart. It will haunt me forever but what will haunt me more is knowing that i will never love him enough or love him the way he loves me. I know that at some point of my life i am going to break his heart. So why not free him now. When i was just caught up in my thoughts, i didn't notice that Ian was just looking at me.

"Ian?" I say when I noticed that he wasn't reacting. He was just staring at me, eyes locked with mine, never forgetting to get a glimp at my lips each few moments. "IAN, are you listening?!" I ask again, angirly. "No" he says and before I know it, he pushed me until my back touched the wall, his lips crashing mine. His kiss was passionate and hungry, like he has been waiting to do this all night long. "Do you want me to stop?" He asks. My breath gets heavier. Yes. "No." His lips are immediately back on mine as he pulls me closer, if that's even possible. My legs automatically wrap around his waist as he lets out a moan. This is so wrong, yet feels so right.

{Ian's P.O.V}
Her lips move in rhythm with mine, telling me she wants me just as much as I want her. She runs her hand through my hair and I kiss her like there is no tommorow, like its just the two of us. How I hope this lasts.

{Rose's P.O.V}
His hand roams around my body, discovering every inch of it. He leaves my lips and lowers his to my neck, kissing my skin slowly as electricity shots through my body and I let out a moan. I feel like I can't pull back. Like I....like I am scared to lose this. But i can't get attached. This is so wrong. He puts his lips back on mine, but I stop myself from kissing him back.

A/N: Please listen to this song while reading this chapter for a better experience. {Apologize by One Republic}

I put a hand on his chest and push him back slowly as i unwrap my legs from around him. "Ian, no. Just...no. I am sorry." I tell him before I leave.

{Ian's P.O.V}
I hear the door close and I close my eyes, groaning in frustration. I feel so foolish. I thought she might feel something towards me, that I actually mean anything to her. But, i dont. At this moment i could not take it anymore. I felt like my heart has shattered into million pieces. My heart was aching. My whole world was falling apart. I felt like i was drowning. The light i once had in my life just vanished away immediately when she pushed me away. All i can feel right now is just darkness surrounding me. I felt rage, anger, fury. I felt fire forming inside in my heart. I felt my blood boiling. Was it all just illusions in my mind? I started punching the wall. My anger was all over the place. My hands hurt but that pain in my hands was nothing compared to the pain i was feeling inside my heart.
"WHY DID SHE DO THAT??!!" I said in anger while still punching the wall.
"WHY!?WHY!?WHY!?"

"Brother what are you doing?"
"EVAN LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" I turned to look at him.

"YOU ARE ASKING ME WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!!....EVERYTHING IS WRONG EVAN...... EVERYTHING IS WRONG AND I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE."
"FIRST I KILLED THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. NOW I LOST THE ONLY PERSON WHO MADE ME FEEL ALIVE AND YOU ARE ASKING ME WHAT IS WRONG?!!"

"IAN, you didn't kill her. Just fucking understand that."

"STOP WITH THAT BULLSHIT. I WAS THE ONE YELLING AND GUESS WHAT I WAS THE ONE DRIVING THE CAR!"

"I HATE MY LIFE EVAN. I RUIN EVERYTHING......."
"I destroy everything i touch, Evan"
"I.........I...love her Evan i fucking love her." As those words escaped my mouth. I felt more pain. I reached my breaking point.

{Evan's P.O.V}
He said those words and i saw tears after that. He fell on his knees. He buried his face in his legs. After that i just heard sobbing. I went close to him and i kneeled infront of him. I started patting his back.
"I don't know what to do Evan. I don't know what to do to make her love me."
"I.....I.... am..... sick .....of .....my life...... i..... wish..........i had died in that accident." He said and he started sobbing again. I have never seen him like that. He was always strong facing his problems. But now i can tell that he was in so much pain.

Meanwhile..........
{Rose's P.O.V}
I've ran like i always did. I just ran. I couldn't bring myself to tell him 'No" but i guess he knew the answer by now. I broke his heart. The pain he is feeling right now is because of me. I am the reason of his suffering now. He is suffering because of me. How i wish i had left him sooner than this. As i was walking back home i felt tears. Tears forming in my eyes. The thought of him being in pain right now is eating me alive. I am trying to tell myself that it's for the best but no i caused him so much pain today. I did not have a choice. I had to do that. It's better to break his heart once than break it continuously. I just wish that he would move on and find someone who will compensate him of what he lost. I am not good for him and I will never be. I am sorry Ian. I am really sorry for giving you hope that we would be something more. I am sorry for breaking your heart. I am sorry for knowing you. I am sorry for letting you fall for me. I am sorry for not letting you go sooner.

{Ian's P.O.V}
I regret.
I regret knowing her.
I regret meeting her.
It would have been better if our relationship was just a therapist and a patient.
It would have been better if she had let me go from the first.
It would have been better if she didn't break my heart.
It would have been better if she just had pushed me away when she realized that i have feelings for her.
But how?
How can you regret something that made you happy?!
How can you regret knowing someone who made you feel alive?!
How can you forget the happiness you felt with that person?!
How can she so suddenly bring mr happiness and just take it away like that?!
Why did she give me hope?!
That fucking question is making me crazy. Why? I keep asking myself. Why did she give me hope when she wasn't planning on staying? Why? Was i hallucinating or something? Was it all just illusions? Am i nothing to her? But how did that happen when i knew she had the same feelings i had? I am sorry but i can't continue like this. I can't just stand and watch every fucking person that i love walk away from me. Am i that bad? Am i that damaged that no one can fall in love with me? Am i a fool for believing that there is forever? She fucked me up. At first i thought that i was the one who was going to break her heart yet she was the one who broke mine. No she didn't break it. It was already broken. She just shattered it into pieces. Why is my life like this? Why? Why did Hayley die? Why did she leave me alone in that fucking world? And why did Rose break my heart? Why did she do that?
My life just became more miserable than ever and me, i became more damaged than ever. I guess my role in life is to get ruined and damaged over and over again.
"Everytime I promise myself not to get attached to people. I find myself too attached that when i lose them, a part of my soul is lost forever. Everytime i make a deal with myself not to depend on the existence of certain people and i experience their loss. I wish i died before they left. I guess after all, I am not so good with controlling my feelings."
~unknown.

End of Chapter 13
I really hope you liked this chapter as i loved writing it.
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A/N: I actually feel sorry for Ian💔