Saving You

20//I wish I could go back in time

Chapter 20

"I wish we could go back in time. To before it all went wrong. When we were pointlessly flirting and joking around. Before I fell for you. Before we broke each other's hearts."
~Unknown

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{Rose's P.O.V}
Sometimes I have to suffer alone because I have no one to take care of me. I have no family, no friends , nothing and that is all because of me. I pushed the only person i truly cared for and loved away. I pushed the only person who truly cared for me and loved me away. I pushed him cause i was afraid to lose him but guess what i lost him both ways.

While i was lost in my thoughts, I found myself on the floor unable to breath and then everything went black....
I think I am dying........
I think it's time for me to leave this world....
I have lost everything and i am the reason for losing everything.
I just want Ian to know that i feel something towards him before i die.........
I just want him to know that he was loved by someone........
I just wanted him to know that it was not by choice to leave him.......
I wish i can go back in time to show him that i truly cared.......

***
That's who i am.......That's Rosetta......I am sick........I have Philophobia........since my parents' death.......my stepmother's death..........my sister's death........
Philphobia..........
The fear of falling in love or being in love...........
I have Philophobia because i loved my parents and they left me........ I loved my stepmother and she also left me.......I loved my sister and she left me too........and i don't want that to happen again........I don't want to experience the loss of those whom i truly love or care for whether by their choice or by death.......I don't want that......and i can't live like that..........
My eyes began to open again......But they close again.......I try to open them again but all i see is darkness....... Am i dead??
I guess i am leaving this world........

{Ian's P.O.V}
As soon as i heard those words, I quickly got up and left. I told Hayley that i forgot that i had an important meeting that can't be delayed. I rushed to Rose's house. I wanted to thank her for encouraging Hayley to come and talk to me. I wanted to tell her how i am grateful for this. But when i reached her house i can't seem to find her there. I call her but there seems no respond. I knocked but i think the house is empty. I quickly went to the beach the only place she would go to if she felt sad but i found no one there. I went to her sister's grave but she wasn't there so i decided to call Eric and ask him.
"Hello Eric!"
"Hey Ian. What's up?"
"Do you know where Rose is?"
"No, i have no idea. Why?"
"I can not seem to find her. She is neither in her house nor is she answering her phone."
"Mmmmm.....weird. Try going to her office."
"Yeah but i know that she is off today.."
"Maybe she is there."
"Okay i will go to her office.."
"Call me when you find her Ian."
"Okay bye."
I went to her office just to find her secretary Cassie. Maybe she knows where Rose is.
"Hey Cassie"
"Oh hey Ian."
"Do you know where Rose is?"
"She didn't call you?"
"No, She didn't. What happened?"
"She is in the hospital..."
"Hospital!! WHY!! Is she okay?"
"I don't know..."
"Fuck!! i am going to the hospital."
I hurried out of the house. I took my car. I call Eric in the way.
"Did you find her Ian?"

"Yeah Cassie said that she is in the hospital."

"OMG!! I know she wasn't going to be okay."

"Do you know something I don't know Eric? Why is she in the hospital?"

"She didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what Eric?"

"That she has Leukemia."

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? WHY DIDN'T SHE TELL ME?AND HOW DID YOU KNOW?"

"So you didn't give her a chance to talk to you, I see. She tried to tell you Ian. Why do you think she called, texted and begged you to meet her? Why do you think she wanted to talk to you?......She wanted to say her goodbyes to you she told me that but you never seemed to give her a chance."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because she wanted to tell you herself and she tried to do that but you never wanted to listen......."

"I am going to the hospital bye."
Fuck my life!! Why didn't i listen to her?? Why did i let my ego get all over the place? Why Ian why?! I hope you are okay Rose. I really hope you are. I can't bear the regret i am gonna feel if something happened to you. Please Don't Leave Me Rosie...

A while later at the hospital.......
"Hello Doctor.... Is there a patient here named Rosie Alfred.....Sorry i mean Rosetta Alfred Smith?"
"Yeah, Are you from family?"
"Ummmm.....Yeah.....I am her .....boyfriend...."
"Well her room is this way.... but be careful she is pretty tired."
I made my way to her room. I was so scared and so worried at the same time but i was also ashamed of myself. I entered the room with my heart skipping beats afraid of what i am going to see next. I see Rose lying on the bed, her face very pale and nearly white, her eyes closed, she was so thin and weak. I stared at her for a while. How didn't i notice that she was sick?? How??? She is different. She looks different. How am i so cruel!! I am so selfish. I should have listened to her instead of running away. While all these thoughts were consuming my mind, i noticed that Rose was struggling to open her eyes.
"Rose!!" I quickly ran to her and held her hands. She slowly opened her eyes.
"Ian!" She said then she closed her eyes and never opened them again. I quickly rushed outside to call a doctor. The doctor entered the room. He examined Rose then he shook his head and sadly said "She slipped into a coma......"

End Of Chapter 20
It was a hell of a chapter😳
Do you think Rose will wake up?
How do you think Ian will react after knowing that?
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