Saving You

28//No More.....

Chapter 28

"She wasn't sad anymore, she was numb, and numb, she knew somehow worse."

*******************************

"What do you mean by the phrase 'I am going back to my real home.'" Eric asked.

“Isn't this place your home?” Cassie asked.

“I am going back to where I was born. I am going back to the place where everything has started. I am going back to London.”

"London? Rose! You can't just go back. You won't bear it Rose. You won't." Cassie said.

"Everything has changed now, Cassie. Everything......The doctor of course told you everything and that's why you guys are here......."

"Yes, Rose. We want to know what are you going to do." Eric said frustrated.

"I already told you. I am going back to London. A new life awaits me......not typically a life but new days......I want to die there.....I want to remember my old life before I am gone......I want to be there......I have nothing left Eric.....Nothing.....I have nothing to lose and nothing to fight for."

"Rose! Don't let the darkness consume you again." Cassie said.

"It already did.....Now please I want to pack my bags....I have a flight in 3 hours."

"What about your treatment?"

"No more.....No more treatments..."

"You can't do that Rose. I won't let you." Eric said.

"I am not asking for your permission. NOW PLEASE JUST GO OUT. I WANT TO PACK MY BAGS." I said and Eric came close to me. He held my hands.

"Please Rose. Don't do this." He said then I quickly pulled my hands from his.

"Please! Now go out....." I said and they turned to leave.

"Wait!" I said then I went to my bed-side table and opened the drawer. There were three letters, I took them. I placed the third one in my bag and I handed Cassie one and Eric the second one.

"What are those?" Cassie asked.

"Those are like goodbye letters in case we didn't get the chance to meet one last time......"

"What about the third one you hide in your bag?" Eric asked.

"Ummmmmm.....I.....It.....is for.....no one. Yes for no one."

"Are you sure?"

"Ye-Yeah..." I said. He opened the envelope and took the letter from it then he started unfolding the letter but I quickly stopped him. He looked at me puzzled.

"Not now.."

"Why?"

"Just not now. Now please guys leave me alone. I need to change my clothes."

"Okay. We are waiting for you in the living room." Cassie said then they both left the room.

I continued packing my things. It was like that I am not coming back here again. I don't know why but I can't bear another second in this place. While I was packing my things, my eyes stopped at something that was hidden in my drawer. I knelt down to bring it. It was the ring Ian had bought me on my birthday. Beside it there was the letter he sent me and the necklace he bought me also. I kept staring at them for a little while. I was staring at them with cold empty eyes. I was emotionless at that moment. I don't want that affect me now. I didn't let it because I have taken the decision. I am not going to be weak again. I will try be strong. Nothing will break me ever again. I am going to start a new life and maybe some day I will be able to come back here again but what I know now is that I don't want to be here again at least not now. I changed into my clothes then I went to the bathroom and I stared at the mirror for a while. I was staring at me. I was trying to figure out the person I have become and that's when I decided to change my look. I don't want to look like the old Rose. I want to be a new one. I went to my room and I grabbed a pair of scissors. I went back to the bathroom and I started cutting my hair. I cut it till there was nothing left to cut. I examined myself by looking at the mirror then I took off my glasses and I wore my black lenses which I kept as a spare.. I don't know why I bought them black but I liked it. I looked at myself in the mirror again. My hair was made in a boy cut that changed my look completely and I liked that. My hair was damaged anyways. I left the bathroom then I changed my clothes again and I put on some dark make up. I wore a black short skirt with just a dark blue top. I put on the necklace Ian gave me and I put the ring and the letter he gave me in my bag.