Days have been faster, not much has been happening.
Sometimes I just want to die, honestly I'm not happy at all.
I'm always self conscious, especially when Elio is around. It's bothering me, why can't I just move on.
After school Tony was weird, he acted like a dick to be honest. First he said that I looked like a boy, then told me that I don't look good with purple glasses and that they should be black because "Black is sexier" he said.
He was looking at me weirdly, I just felt insulted.
"Remember when we went out together?"
"Um yeah?"
"Well...I liked it."
"Okay?"
I felt like he was hinting "will you go out with me again?" Obviously it's a no.
I told him,
"Go hit on Laurie, didn't you like her before?"
"I didn't like her."
"Mmmhhhmmmm"
"I didn't."
"Okay."
"Why are you asking me to hit on her, you think I'm flirting with you?"
"No it's just the way you said..."
"Do you want to go out again?"
"No..."
The.Worst.Person.Wants.To.Go.Out.With.Me.
Why, why Tony?
Out of all the guys in my school, it had to be my ex. He's disgusting and calls me "thick".
I always tell myself that no one loves me but for some reason my ex still does.
I just felt very weird, Ben just laughed when I told him what happened.
Days were actually starting to get a little bit better, except that I was throwing up what I ate. But that isn't considered anorexia, so I guess you can say that I'm okay.
My self-harm is still there, about every night I do about one.
My friends do notice, but they can't stop me.
I haven't really been with my mother often, she's either at work or with my little brother.
He always gets the attention, I want to be more with Mom...
I'm not comfortable with her, I feel like she doesn't listen to me because she is always busy.
And all I do is try to hide my marks, which she noticed today.
"Honey show me your arm."
"No..."
"Anne show me your arm."
"I don't want to!", I yelled.
"Please show me.", she said coldly.
I let her take my arm and look at it.
"Anne seriously? You can't do that...."
"I know..."
"So why do you do it!"
"I don't know!"
"You do know!"
I walked away and cried.
YOU ARE READING
Fml
Teen Fiction"Are you ok?" "What's wrong?" "Are you sad?" "Everything will be okay". Honestly, I'm not okay, what's wrong? Everything! And why am I sad? Because I can't handle anything anymore and NOTHING will be okay. I don't know why I always need to lie to ev...
