hamilton fluff (pretty much just jeffmads fluff =3)

(3) trying to impress him

I showed up at the park 15 minutes early, out of breath because I had ran there in case he was early too. '.....Guess maybe I'm a little too early....' Then I pulled out my book. About 5 minutes later, I looked up and noticed Thomas was there across the park. "Hi, beat you here" "By 5 minutes and I'm still 10 minutes early." "Any victory is a victory, no matter how unimportant." "... I feel like you just quoted somebody, but I'm not a book worm." This made me laugh "Every other thing I say to you is a quote, you're just now catching this?" "What quote did you use yesterday then?!" "when right before math I handed you a pencil and said 'Return with this or upon this' and you laughed, but it was something the Romans would say as they were taking their shields to the battlefield because if they didn't win a war, they would have died" "...oh that's deep, kinda messed up too." 'Oh, I'm entirely messed up, you have absolutely no idea, do you Thomas?' "Yes, it is very messed up because you'd be like, 'Okay, now go to war, and if you don't die and don't have a victory, I don't wanna speak to you even if you barely made it out alive' " "How do you know this though?" 'because I studied ancient history to find out how they dealt with death because I had no idea how to.' "Random knowledge, google is like that sometimes. (GOOGLE KNOWS ALL) You're watching a cat video one minute, next minute you're reading 'MacBeth,' happens a lot." "... what the heck is MacBeth...?"  "A shakespeare play, also a book, pretty good too. About a Scottish man whose need for power drove him to murder and insanity, eventually someone named MacDuff noticed his mental stability was gone entirely, so he killed him." "Okay, you read way too much James." I smiled at this, "So what, a nerd's gotta read." "Quit calling yourself a nerd, you're just really smart, that's not a bad thing." Then I mumbled something, "Apparently I'm not smart enough, or maybe I'm too smart, I don't know, is it a bad thing nobody figured it out?" Again, I slapped a hand over my mouth, then laughed nervously. 'Can I just shut my mouth for a while...?' "Figured out what?" "That..... Uhh... do I have to say it, because I don't really wanna..." "I'd very much appreciate it if you told me...?" 'There's the guilt trip, here we go again.' "well... I'm .... Not... mentally right... in any way, at all, whatsoever." "What makes you say that?"
I started messing with my hair, 'uhh think of an excuse... ummmmm uhh well uhh cOME ON THINKKKK...!' "....Just do...? I know I'm a little mentally messed up, don't know how I know that though." He looked at me skeptically. "Hmmmmm......" " you know I'd never lie to you unless it's for your own protection, right?" "Yeah, but I'd say lying about being mentally off might be what you think is for my own protection..." '...oh no...' I mumbled something, or at least tried to, but my voice came out as a cracked whisper, "Wow, ok, shut up senpai." "huh?"

"N-nothing." 'S T U T T E R' I cleared my throat, "Nothing to worry about, Thomas." "okay...?" "Oh, random question, have you ever played Doki Doki Literature Club?" "Duh!" "Favorite girl?" "Natsuki, you?" "Yuri." (i can imagine Alex just running over yelling "YOU'RE BOTH WRONG, MONIKA IS BEST GIRL!!" XD) "Agreeable, ever played Yandere Simulator?" "YES! I KILLED EVERYBODY FIRST TRY!!!" 'ok, tone down the psycho yandereness.' "...Do you have a Senpai in real life? You seemed excited about killing everyone, would you kill for your senpai in real life, because I wouldn't." I whispered so low, for a second I thought I said it in my head, "Yes I do, I am excited, and yes I would." Apparently, Thomas heard this, because he jumped back a little. "Heh, your sense of humor is part of why you're my friend James." I laughed too, but I wasn't joking. I continued to laugh as I said, "Scratch that, I already killed for Senpai." He took it as another joke, but something inside me made me get a serious look on my face, 'no.... No, I laugh so he thinks it was a joke, I'll tell him later.... LAUGH PLEASE' I guess I just didn't find it funny. "...You... are joking, correct?" "Oh- of course! How messed up would it be if I actually liked somebody, didn't have the courage to tell them, and then decided to kill for them because that's all I could do without confessing how I feel, which I'm not gonna do" 'maybe he won't notice the present tense non-hypothetical verb there? Kinda gives away my yandereness pretty badly.' "Why'd you change verb tense?" "I don't know" 'lies.'