"shhhh!"
"you're not supposed to eat it yet!"
"I'm not?"
we laughed and chris hushed us again, closing the cabinet.
"okay, let's go!"
we all hurried out of the kitchen with bags of marshmallows and chips, packs of chocolate and crackers and towards the classroom where the rest of them were waiting for us.
we made it to the room, dropping everything on the ground and everyone cheered, chris telling us to shut up but laughing as well.
"wow, I didn't know they had all this!" nate exclaimed.
"they say they save it for special occasions," chris told us, "and yes, I checked the expiration date riley!"
riley laughed. "I was just checking!"
riley had just arrived two weeks ago and she was a little intimidating to begin with but warmed up to us when alyssa sat next to her to make sure she was eating and getting to know her had been pretty amazing.
"why are one of the bags open?" immy asked, holding up the potato chips phil had been eating and I narrowed my eyes at him.
"I got impatient, chris was taking too long!" phil exclaimed and chris began to shout at him about he was the only one who knew where all the treats were so we should be grateful.
I smiled and looked around at the group of friends I'd managed to make in the few months I was here and it warmed my heart.
every time I thought about the fact that I wouldn't have met my boyfriend and best friend if I hadn't tried to take my own life made me so sad but I was so incredibly grateful that I hadn't succeeded because now, I have more purpose to keep going in life and I have never been so happy about seeing so many people.
I still wasn't able to see my little brother as much as I'd like to but knowing he was happy and safe with his real father was enough to keep me going.
"you okay?" phil asked me, taking my hand.
I grinned and nodded. "I am."
and I truly was; yeah, there were still issues we were all having but I've come to learn that when we struggle, we don't struggle alone.
"what are you thinking about?"
"the stars, and how they shine for you," I replied as we sat in my room, staring out the window.
"coldplay. is that what you're thinking of?" phil questioned me with a chuckle and I joined him, shaking my head.
"no, I just... I'm really grateful. I feel so much more complete than I've ever felt in my life," I said.
phil smiled and leaned in to kiss my head. "I'm grateful, too. I have you."
I blushed and hid my face in his chest like the loser I was.
there was a soft tap on the door and in came chris with more bags of chips, as if we hadn't had enough earlier.
"I'm sorry, were you guys having a moment?" chris teased and we laughed.
"I thought you guys wouldn't mind company," chris continued, pulling in someone by the wrist.
"I didn't agree to this, I just wanted junk food," riley said with a sarcastic tone and smiled.
"hey, we're lucky we didn't find them fucking," chris said under his breath but loud enough for phil and I to hear.
"you've never caught us fucking!" I exclaimed frantically as everyone else laughed.
YOU ARE READING
ill // phan au
Fanfiction"you kind of remind me of stars; you only shine at night when no one is watching." (lower case intended // trigger warning)