Personal Assistant (Ryden)

Chapter eight

"Hey," Ryan says, seeing his old best friend sitting on a log in front of the fire. Spencer smiles at him, so Ryan sits down. 

"So, about you and Brendon...?"

"I know how it looks. I... I didn't come here for that, I came because I was hired as Sarah's makeup artist but... things have changed for me, I guess, and now I'm Brendon's personal assistant."

"I saw how he was treating you earlier, that's why I'm worried," Spencer looks over at the almost scarily skinny man, "so, how have you been other than that?"

"Good. Moved to Seattle to take care of grandma," Ryan says, and him and Spencer both smile.

"Your grandma is the best, always so sweet," Spencer says. The two continue to catch up for another hour and Brendon realizes that Ryan's not answering his texts. Brendon stands and walks around, then sees the fire.

"How do you let Brendon boss you around so much?" Spencer asks, gaining Brendon's full attention. Ryan sighs, shuffling slightly as Brendon stands behind a tree to hear them. He doesn't care that he is eavesdropping, they're talking about him. It's 100% his business.

"He's my boss, if I didn't, I'd be fired and broke, and I need the money to pay rent and... well, live. I'll be fine," Ryan reassures him.

"I know, but you... I don't know, I'm... I'm just worried..." Spencer continues drawing in the wet dirt with the stick, Ryan watching the fire.

"Because last time I said that I would be fine I was hospitalized?" Ryan smirks jokingly, but it's still serious. Brendon frowns slightly.

"I remember having to take you to the hospital, how we couldn't tell anyone what happened, just that you were hit by a car and they drove off before we could get a glimpse of their faces," Spencer continues, and Ryan laughs lightly. It feels like it was yesterday for the two. There's a short silence, and Brendon turns to leave, but Ryan speaks up.

"No, no matter how much of a dick he can be to me, Brendon will never be like my dad." He shakes his head and Brendon's heart sinks in a reason that is unknown to him, but it hurts. It feels as if someone stabbed him in the chest.

Spencer looks at Ryan's arm. It has always been a habit, and he doesn't know if he's done it in the past few months, but he knows what happened just 5 months ago. He remembers it, not being able to get a hold of Ryan when it all happened.

"I'm sorry. My mom told me about what happened with him. I wanted to make the funeral but I didn't know how the hell to contact you, and believe me, I tried. But about that and... you know," Spencer says carefully, gesturing to Ryan's arms slightly, and Ryan tenses up. He feels himself having to fight back the tears. He lets out a small, very quiet gasp enough to make Brendon's heart hurt again.

Spencer looks at him worriedly. "I'm sorry-"

"Don't. Just... stop," he says almost bitterly, which surprises Brendon. Ryan inhales shakily and it hurts Brendon again. Ryan quietly and brokenly speaks, "Just go." Brendon hears it and frowns, confused by all of the aches in his heart that this boy has managed to produce as well as the fact that Ryan has always seemed too shy to stand up for himself.

"Make sure you get some sleep," Spencer says. Ryan doesn't speak as Spencer stands up and leaves. He had always known as to leave Ryan alone when he needed to be. Now is one of those moments.

Brendon's eyes widen and he hides behind a tree as Spencer nears him, snow almost silently crunching beneath his feet. He waits a long time, not sure where he should go. Eventually Brendon swallows the growing lump in his throat, walking towards Ryan, not sure what to do with his awkward hands as he nears. A tear falls down Ryan's face just as Brendon stands near him. He is trying his best not to break, it's obvious. He looks so sad. Brendon watches him close his eyes and inhale shakily in a way that breaks his heart.

"Ross?" He asks carefully. Ryan jumps as he looks at him and wipes his tears.

"Um, sorry, I was just... looking at the fire, I-"

"Oh, don't be so modest now, Ross," Brendon says, a serious and possibly annoyed expression on his face.

"I'm sorry," Ryan says, looking down. Brendon moves closer, putting his arm around Ryan's waist. Ryan tenses, full of a mix of fear and confusion.

"Stop being so sorry," Brendon says, and with the lack of a response, he realizes that he should be nicer. So, he takes a deep breath and tries again. "Are you alright?" His voice is a lot lower and calmer. Ryan looks at him, and notices that his eyes are filled with worry.

Brendon suddenly tenses, the glow of the fire shining on Ryan's sad-ridden face. His other hand raises to move the hair out of his face, just to see more of the cute brunet.

"Brendon?" The simple name barely comes out as a whisper. 

Brendon's hand slowly trails down to his cheek, thumb rubbing it gently. Ryan's heart speeds up and swallows nervously. Brendon watches his Adam's apple bob up and down as he does so, and Brendon wonders what his skin would taste like.

"Brendon, w-what are... what are you doing?" Ryan asks, almost scared, because his hand is cupping his jaw and his other hand has rested on his hip. Brendon just stares into his eyes, blinking every once in a while.

"Nothing," he says softly, a small crooked smile planted on his face. A wave of nervousness hits Ryan, and he internally curses his mind. Brendon slowly leans forward, and the dizziness hits him. He's been working nonstop since 6 am and didn't get a break until about an hour ago. No wonder why he's about to pass out.

Brendon glances very briefly at Ryan's body-- his blue hoodie, pale skin, soft pink lips, wavy but still pretty short brown hair, perfect features, Ryan's perfect looking.

"You aren't gonna tell anyone about this, got it?" He whispers, and Ryan nods. Brendon leans in, closing the gap. Their lips connect, and Brendon tenses when he feels his heart flutter and chills run up his spine. He can't feel this way towards his PA, but here he is, kissing him. 

The sleeves on Ryan's hoodie are brought up when he innocently places his hands on the sides of Brendon's neck. Their lips move very slowly together and they both feeling like they're melting, like the fire has that effect. 

Ryan tries to keep up with the feeling but his body slowly begins to drain of energy. He's barely hanging on, trying to get as much of it as he can before it is gone.

He pulls away and almost immediately falls to the ground. Brendon stops.

Did he just... faint?

"Ross?" Brendon stands and rushes to the other side of the log, shaking him, but not getting a response. He looks around before grabbing the small jug of water, pouring it on the fire. Brendon picks Ryan up bridal style, silently carrying him to the cabin and into their room. Everyone's gone to bed. Brendon was going to, but it's clear how that went. 

Maybe it's good that he got worried about his assistant.