Will they accept us?- Yoonseok

A/N #2

My dog, Tiny, died a couple days ago. He was a family dog for two years. He was a small, fluffy chihuahua (the picture above). We got him when he was one year old. My sister had a friend who was giving him away.

I don't like dogs much, and I've only liked two; he was the second dog.

At first, I didn't like him much, but, after a while, I started warming up to him. I started petting him and carrying him more and more often. Soon, he started sleeping on my side of the occasionally.

I remember starting of the day by waking up to my alarm. I fed my cats, I learned the first part of 'Fire', and I showered. I was taking care of my cats, who had just gotten spayed.

When my mom left, she let out Tiny, so he could use the restroom and play with our outside dog, Pechocha. I didn't hear her when she said she had let him out.

I was just in my room, minding my own business with one of my cats that was allowed to stay inside while she got better. When another of my alarms went to tell it was time to feed my cats, I went outside.

As I was coming back inside through the garage's back door, I saw my dog laying under the fence where the door opened. At first, I thought he was just laying there, but, then,when I called his name, and he didn't wag his tail or come towards me, it worried me.

I walked closer to him, and I finally saw him.

His left eye was popped out of the socket and you could see the dried blood that had bled from his eye. He wasn't moving, so I freaked out.

I pulled the fence door off of him, making him yell in pain, which scared me so bad. I ran back inside and into the front yard.

I went around my house to get to the side he was on. I looked at him carefully and saw his eye from a back angle and it was horrible. I couldn't breath properly out shock and panic.

I crept closer to him and touched him. He didn't do anything and, for a second, I thought he was dead, but I saw his eye move. I ran back inside to my mom's and step-dad's room.

When that was happening my mom wasn't there, so only my step-dad and my baby sister. I told my step-dad and he went to go look at him. The whole time I couldn't stop shaking, crying, and blaming myself.

I told my mom about my dog needing to go to the vet, but I let my step-dad finish the story. Later once she arrived, we went to the only animal hospital that was open for twenty-four hours.

After we got the results, we learned that what had happened was that he was hit by a car. They think he dragged himself to where he could after he was hit.

In the end, we couldn't do anything for him. The veterinarians weren't even sure if he had a brain trauma or fractured spine or anything like that. If we put anesthetics on him to pop the eye back into the socket, he could've died.

We came back home, and then my sisters came a little while after. It hurt to see them like that. I wanted to say: 'I'm sorry I was irresponsible. I'm sorry for not being more aware of him.', but the words wouldn't come out.

I feel so at fault because I was responsible for taking care of the animals while my mom was out getting groceries and step-dad were busy taking care of my little sister.

The next day, when we took him to a new vet that was closer and more affordable. My oldest sister found out that Tiny's spinal cord was severely messed up, and, to get surgery for that, we'd have to go to Corpus Cristi at A&M.

Even with the surgery, he's never walk. He would only be able to move his head. He'd need a lot of attention to help him eat, use the restroom, and everything else. My sister didn't want him to suffer like that, so she had him put down and cremated.

When me and my sister received the message of what has happened, we both started reading it. I finished the message first, so I went to the room and started crying.

I felt and still feel at fault for what happened. I blame myself over his death. If I hadn't been so distracted by reading or being on my phone, then maybe I could've called him inside before it could happen.

I really miss him so much. The house feels empty without his claws tapping on the floor. It feels weird stretching out my feet because he used to lay there causing me to always fold my legs.

I miss hugging him when I would get excited or sad over something like a show or over the book I was reading. I miss him scratching the side of the bed to get my attention, so I could bring him up on the bed.

He was a very good and loyal dog. Me and my family don't really want dogs anymore because of the things that have happened.

I wish is that I could've prevented it from happening when I had the chance. I wish I could say 'I'm sorry'. I wish my mom didn't blame herself for what happened.

I wish my mom and my sister didn't fight over something as dumb as bringing birds to make the house a little more cheerful at least. I wish when they fight over the birds that they wouldn't point fingers at each other.

I wish I could tell them that I could carry that burden for them because it's my fault after all.

Rest In Piece Tiny

Date: 6/28/18
Word count: 1017 words

Edit:

Someone from our neighborhood told us what what happened to Tiny. Turns out our neighbor hit him, and our other dog helped him get to the fence, but we don't have any proof, only what the neighbor said.

I honestly had a feeling he did because it felt like I was being watched from one of the windows of our neighbors house. If he was hit by a car then why would he have head trauma and certain bones fractured.

Not only that, but it looked like he was being chased by something and was trying to run away. He was under the fence door and he was curled up in a ball like when dogs get hit and yelled at.

My mom has also seen our neighbor throwing wood at our dog because he was barking at him. My mom was calling him over at the time when it happened.

I really can't believe how someone can do that. I don't know why people think hitting an animal is right. I believe animals are like humans just in a different form and have a different life style. Animals shouldn't be treated that way.

Date: 7/5/18
Word count: 1220 words