Broken Promises {Brendon Urie}

Chapter 14

~Sarah~

I told Brendon off. I lost my cool. I flipped. I broke. I snapped. Again. But this time, instead of bursting into tears, I got angry. I got angry at Brendon. At Zack. At Dallon. At myself. Even Spencer, who was unconscious. I was angry because my daughter was in a hospital bed, unable to move. I was angry because there was nothing anyone could have done. If there had been something anyone could have done, I would have had someone to blame. But there was nothing. I had no one to blame. So I got angry and I snapped. I snapped and Brendon got caught in the crossfire.

"I'm sorry," I sighed. I crouched down in front of Brendon and put my head in my hands. 

"Sarah, it's okay," he said, putting a hand on my head. "You have the right to be angry and yell."

"Let's just go see Spencer," I mumbled, standing up and rolling Brendon the rest of the way to Spencer, who was still unconscious. 

We didn't stay long. There wasn't a reason for us to stay too long. Then we went to see Rilynn. I figured she probably wasn't awake, but Brendon wanted to see her. When we got down there, one of the nurses smiled at us and I smiled back. She'd been Rilynn's nurse that day. I opened the door and pulled Brendon inside. I wasn't really paying attention until I heard a small voice.

"Mom? Dad?" My head shot up and I saw Rilynn, her eyes fully open. My hands went to my mouth and I started crying again. Brendon used his arms to roll himself towards Rilynn's bed.

"Hey, baby, how are you feeling?" he asked her. I stood there, too shocked to move. She didn't take her eyes off of me. 

"Mom? Mom, don't cry," she said. "Please don't cry." She said 'Mom'. She called me Mom. I wasn't Sarah anymore, I was Mom.

"Sarah?" Brendon asked. I walked over, bent down, and wrapped my arms around Rilynn. I knew she couldn't feel it, but I was just so happy.

"Mom, don't cry," she laughed. "You'll make me cry."

"I'm sorry, I'm just happy you're awake," I whispered, crying still.

"Well, we're not done yet," she whispered. "They want to do another surgery soon. They said some doctors would come talk to us."

I let go of her after awhile and we sat in her room and talked to her. We told her how the others were doing and she seemed a little upset about Spencer, but she wanted to see Dallon. I could tell she was worried about the others, but she had a special bond with Dallon. When the door slid open, I looked up and saw three doctors enter the room.

"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Urie," Rilynn's pediatric surgeon said. "This is our neurosurgeon and our cardio thoracic surgeon. They want to discuss Rilynn's next surgery with you." Brendon and I shook hands with the new doctors.

"Once Rilynn is strong enough, we want to go into surgery to try and reverse her paralysis," the neurosurgeon started. 

"My job is going to be to monitor her heart and make sure it doesn't fail during surgery like in her last one," the cardio surgeon added. "We want to take all necessary precautions to ensure she is safe while we perform the surgery."

"So you want to take her back into surgery? When?" Brendon asked.

"We want to get it scheduled as soon as she's strong enough to handle it."

"Her heart is still a little weak from the crash and the last surgery," the cardio surgeon explained. "We're hoping for sometime this week, but it may have to wait. We're also aware that she will need to have another surgery and that she has brain damage we need to monitor in the OR."

"The thing is, we need sign parent consent to perform the surgery, because she's a minor," her pediatric surgeon explained.

"So this surgery," I began, "explain what it will do again?"

"Of course," her neurosurgeon said. "So as of right now, Rilynn is paralyzed, which means she can't move anything. She's stuck in that one position. The surgery we want to perform could give her full range of motion again, if done successfully."

"And what if it isn't successful?" Brendon asked.

"Brendon!" I said, swatting his arm.

"No, it's alright," the neurosurgeon laughed lightly. "If not successful, it could paralyze her for life and we may not be able to fix it. But rest assured, I am very good at my job."

"I'm sure you are, but I want the best for my daughter," Brendon said.

"Dad, it's okay," Rilynn said.

"Believe me, sir, he is very good at what he does," Dr. Karev, her pediatric surgeon, assured us. "Rilynn is in very good hands, I promise. And I'll be there the whole time."

"I don't know about this surgery," Brendon said. "It seems a little risky."

"Let me assure you, all surgery comes with it's risks, but we are very good at what we do," the neurosurgeon assured him.

"Brendon, I say if Rilynn wants the surgery, she should be able to get the surgery," I said sternly. And it was true. It was Rilynn's choice. 

"I want the surgery, Dad," she said. "If it'll help me move again, I want it. I don't want to be stuck in a wheelchair having to have someone take me everywhere and feed me and do everything for me. I want to be able to walk on my own and feed myself and perform on a stage someday. If this surgery will help me do that, then I want it."

"Then I'm signing the paper," I said. "And you should too."

I was handed a clipboard with some papers on it. I read through before signing. Then I handed it to Brendon. He didn't make to read it or sign. I sat next to Rilynn and held her hand, watching Brendon. 

"We'll give you some time." The doctors left, closing the door behind them.

"Brendon, the papers," I said.

"I can't," he whispered.

"Dad, please, I want the surgery," Rilynn begged. "Please just sign the papers."

"I'm not signing the goddamn papers!" he yelled. Rilynn went completely silent.

"Brendon!" I yelled back. "That's enough!"

"I'm not signing the goddamn papers, Sarah!"

"Brendon Boyd Urie, that is enough!"

"Mom." There was a choking-type noise coming from behind me. I whirled around and Rilynn was shaking. Her eyes were rolled back in her head and the monitors were beeping loudly and making noise. 

"Rilynn? Rilynn?" I was starting to freak out. Brendon rolled himself to the door, sliding it open and yelling for help. A couple doctors and nurses came in and started yelling and rushing around. 

"Page Karev!" someone yelled. "You two need to leave. Can someone get them out of here?" Brendon and I were escorted out of the room and people were crowding around Rilynn trying to take care of her. I collapsed on the floor in tears.

*So Em and I start school tomorrow (yikes) and that means updates will be slow. I know for a fact that I will be trying my hardest, but it's going to be a difficult adjustment. For the first few weeks, there may not be any updates as I get adjusted and figure out how I can squeeze writing and editing into my schedule. I will definitely try and get updates out on weekends that I do not have tennis. After I get everything figured out, I should be back to updating semi regularly. I'm not sure about Em, so if you have any questions you'll have to ask her. Also, if you have any questions concerning my writing or updating "schedule", feel free to message me :)