Broken Promises {Brendon Urie}

Chapter 16

~Sarah~

"Listen, Sarah, I'm sorry." We argued over the topic of Rilynn for an hour longer before he finally caved in. "I know I've been a dick. I didn't have a right to talk to you like that. I'll sign the papers only because it's what she wants." He signed the papers on the clipboard and we went back to Rilynn's room to wait. I didn't leave the room one time in the couple of hours it took before she got back. She was sleeping when they brought her back. 

"She has a brain bleed," the doctor sighed. "We knew about it beforehand, but it got worse too quickly for us to notice. It was originally just a small brain bleed that we would take care of during her next surgery, but then it got worse, causing today to happen. The anesthesia hasn't worn off yet, but she should wake up shortly."

"We have the papers, for the surgery," I said, holding out the clipboard that had both Brendon's and my signatures. The doctor nodded and took the clipboard from me. 

"We'll see if we can do the surgery," he said. "As soon as we can get her in, we will. Are you still sure about this? It's an experimental surgery. It's only been done a few times successfully."

"We know," I said. "We want her to the have surgery. If you think it'll help her, then we think it's a good idea."

The days wore on ever so slowly. Eventually Brendon got the feeling back in his legs, and they started him on physical therapy to help him walk again. Rilynn had her surgery once she was strong enough, and they still weren't sure whether or not it worked. If she woke up and could move her fingers and toes even a little bit, they'd know it'd worked. If she didn't wake up, she wasn't going to. And if she woke up and couldn't even move her fingers a little bit, they'd paralyzed her for life. It all came down to the next few days with her. If she didn't wake up in five to seven days after surgery, there wouldn't be anything else they could do. So I prayed. I prayed so much. Brendon and I weren't religious, but if there happened to be a god of some sort out there, we needed them. When Brendon was in physical therapy, I would sit with Rilynn. I would sit next to her bed and pray.

One day, on the last day that Rilynn had to wake up, Brendon surprised me by walking to Rilynn's room. He had help, of course, but he made it all the way to her without the wheelchair. When I heard his voice and saw him standing there, leaning against the doorway for support, I started crying. I hugged him so tightly, he had to practically pry me away from him so he could breathe. 

"There's no need to cry, Sarah," he laughed, smiling. "I'm fine. I walked all the way here."

"I know," I cried. "That's why I'm crying. They're happy tears. I'm so proud of you, B. You've worked so hard to get here."

"I couldn't not be here when she woke up," he whispered, holding me close. I nodded and kept hugging him. 

"I love you so much," I whispered.

"I love you, too, babe."

Brendon took another lap with his physical therapist and I sat with Rilynn, just waiting. I was glad he was getting better. I just wish she and Spencer were too. . . . Dallon had been released and he was staying in a hotel nearby while the others recovered so that they could get back to tour as soon as everyone was better. Zack was getting there. They said he'd be able to leave in a few more days. Spencer still hadn't woken up. There was minimal brain activity and little chance that he would pull through; at least, that's what the doctors said. Every day I was starting to think more and more that they were right. Brendon refused to believe it. He refused to believe that we wouldn't all make it out of this. The thing is, even if we make it out with everyone alive, we aren't all going to be the same. 

Dallon, Brendon, and Zack are still going to blame themselves. Spencer won't like that he had to miss out on so much. Rilynn would be completely traumatized, if she wasn't paralyzed,too. She'd be scared. She'd worry every time she got into the car; worried that this would happen again and she may not make it next time. And I'll have to watch it. I'll just have to stand there and watch her be absolutely terrified, and I won't be able to do anything about it. 

It was late when I'd almost given up all hope. Brendon wanted to keep walking all day, but I made him go back to his room to sleep. I walked him there myself, because the physical therapist had to leave and he refused to walk back with him. So I grabbed him arm and helped him up. 

"Come on, Bren, you have to go to bed," I said. He groaned.

"Can't I just sleep here like you?" he begged.

"No, Bren, you can't," I said. "Your doctors will wonder where you are. And I will not take the heat for you. Now, let's go. She'll be fine. I don't expect her to wake up while I'm walking you back to your room."

"Sarah, don't be so negative," he said, shaking his head.

"I'm not being negative, I'm being realistic," I said. "Come on, Bren, I know you can move your legs."

"Ugh, fine," he sighed. We walked slowly, but eventually we got there. I helped him into bed and pulled the covers up.

"Do you need anything before I leave?" I asked.

"Can you put my water closer?" he asked. I nodded and moved his water to where he could reach it. I kissed him before leaving, closing the door behind me. 

I walked quickly to check on Spencer once more time that night before I went to sit with Rilynn. Still no change in him. I sighed and squeezed his hand.

"C'mon, Spence," I whispered. "We need you. You have to get better. You have to wake up. I need to see your smile. Brendon needs to see your smile. I'm losing hope, for both you and Rilynn. Brendon told me not to, that you'd both be fine, but I just can't believe him anymore. C'mon, Spence. Please." I squeezed his hand once more before I let go and left. I glanced back one more time before heading back to my daughter.

*So I finally edited this chapter :') Sorry it was kind of a filler chapter. I'm trying to do the least amount of fillers as possible. Anywho, I want to tell you guys that either later tonight or tomorrow, Em and I are publishing a new book. It's just a book where we will post news and stuff, but you should check it out anyways. If you don't add it to your list, you may miss an important update! We may also do Q & A's on there and there will be some polls for you to participate in. I think it would be a good idea if you checked it out once we get it up. I don't want it to seem like I'm forcing y'all, but I'm recommending it so that you don't miss any news we may have! 

Thanks, loves.

A <3