One Bad Day

The Riddler

Harley's POV

I was pleasantly surprised to wake up in my Mistah J's arms. It was something that had never happened before. On the few occasions Mistah J slept in the same bed, he would wake several hours before I did. He doesn't sleep much. Nightmares plagued him, but he's never told me what it is that he dreams about. All I know is that the nightmares usually end in violence with Mistah J trying to kill someone in his sleep. He says that's why he never sleeps in the same bed with me.

But last night, on our wedding night, he did. I smile at waking up with him holding me. I look up at his face. He looked so sweet and almost had a child like innocence when he slept. I think it is the only time I've truly seen him at rest. To look at him, you'd never guess he had killed a ton of people. You'd never guess that a monster could come out of him. You wouldn't even think about the newspaper headlines because this was the face of an angel.

I look to the ring on my finger expecting it to not be there. Expecting it to have been placed there in one of my wildest, sweetest dreams. But it was there, just s beautiful as I remembered. The rich purple of the diamond sparkled in the faintest of light. I will never take it off my finger for a second.

I lightly traced my Puddin's cheek. Before I can even make a full swipe Mistah J is grabbing my wrist with a vice like grip. His eyes open and he quickly moves to pin me to the bed by my throat. His fist rares back, ready to strike like a coiled up snake. I gasp and can see the sudden recognition in his eyes.

"Oh... I'm sorry baby..." He quickly lowers his fist, "I... I shouldn't have slept here last night... I should have known that..."

"No puddin, it's my fault. I shouldn't have startled you," I say.

I can see Mistah J's eyes start to prowl my body. Slowly a smile crosses his lips, "You know, since I have you here..." His lips crash down on mine and I wrap my arms around his neck.

We're interrupted by knock at the door. Mistah J growls and glares at the door. "What?!" He snaps. I quickly pull the covers over me because I know that the door is about to open.

Johnny slowly opens the door and pokes his head in. "I'm sorry boss, but Nygma is here. He won't tell me what he wants, he just said that he had to see you."

Mistah J sighs and runs his hand through his untamed hair. "Couldn't you just shoot him in the kneecap?"

"Well, he didn't come alone. He has seven men with him, plus a driver, heavily strapped," Frost explains.

"Well, you're in charge, deal with it. Can't you see this is interrupting my morning?" I notice the lack of agression in Mistah J's voice. Normally by this point he would have some form of weapon out, daring anyone to dare him to use it.

"He insisted boss. I tried to circumvent this problem from every angle. The Riddler threatened to throw pebbles at your window."

"He was at my wedding yesterday, doesn't he realize that I don't want to see anyone today?"

Frost shrugs emphatically, "I don't know boss."

"Johnny old boy, you're lucky I'm in a good mood," Mistah J frowns and throws the covers off of him. He stands up and pulls on a wine colored robe. He comes his hair back and leaves the room with Frost.

After they leave I get up and pull on my own robe with property of the Joker emblazoned on the back in gold. I quietly make my way down stairs, holding back far enough to see and hear Mistah J in the living room.

"Joker," Nygma smiles, "Salutations," he tips his hat at him. "Tell me, what sound does..."

Mistah J puts his hand up with an exasperated sigh, "Nygma, if you say a riddle I'm going to see your lips together with a very dull, very rusty needle."

"I had assumed that you'd be in a better mood given your nuptials yesterday," Nygma frowns.

"I'm titillated. You're just interrupting my good mood. So why don't you say what you came here for and leave. I have shit to do you know."

"Fair enough. I would like you to help me with a plot that will kill Batman," he says flatly looking at Mistah J quite seriously.

Mistah J scoffs, "I'm leaving town. I haven't the time," he shakes his head.

"But I assure you, it's a foolproof plan," the Riddler tries to sway Mistah J.

"Planned by you?! HaHaHa!! That was a good joke Nygma!"

The Riddler's eyes narrowed at Mistah J. "I'm quite serious Joker," he straightens his tie.

"HaHaHa! How can you claim to be serious in that ridiculous hat?!" Mistah J soon pulls a serious look to his face, "Time up, now you must be going."

"You're going to regret turning me away."

"Well, till then, get the fuck out," Mistah J says. I can see him funbling with his gun in his pocket.

The Riddler spins on his heels with his men behind him. Mistah J turns around as well to leave the living room. Johnny calls out to him.

"Boss, you want me to have him watched?"

"Who? Nygma?! HaHaHa! He's harmless enough. Forget the Riddler. But I do need you to arrange for Harley and I to go to Hawaii. Call the pilot. Tell him to fuel the jet. I'm taking my wife on a honeymoon."

I can't contain my joy and rush down the stairs into my Puddin's arms. "We're going to Hawaii?!?!"

He smiles at me brightly, "Does that please you pumpkin?"

"Yes!! I love you so much!! I'm gonna go pack!" I rush off and head up the stairs.

"Before we go, I want the doctor to do a thorough exam," Mistah J calls out to me. "I'll wake her, you pack."