One Bad Day

Right From Wrong

Ok guys, this is the end of the journey. Hope you tell me how my first Joker book turned out.
-sg

Joker's POV

I was awake, slouched at my desk and staring blankly, with dry burning eyes, at the security moniters. I see and hear Lucy wake up, fussing and wiggling, kicking her covers away on one of the screens. I already know what she needs. She wants a midnight snack. A growing girl's gotta eat after all. So I walk to her room and deactivate the security grid on a panel outside the door. I open the door, crossing over to her, and bending over, taking her into my arms. She instantly settled down knowing that her Daddy always knows just what she needs. Daddy always fixes everything for her. She has me completely and irrevocably wrapped around her little finger.

"You are so whooped."

"Definitely."

"Ah, I think it's sweet."

I walk with her to the kitchen and start making her a bottle. I've got this routine down blind folded, drainboard, scoop, water, shake, warm, shake. I place it to her lips and they greedily search for it. She makes little frustrated grunts that are so precious. She always gets so excited for it. I don't think she's going to be very patient. I can't imagine where she gets that trait from.

"Oooh! I know! Pick me!"

I smile as she latches on and her tiny hands hold mine that has her bottle. She would be holding it on her own soon. So independent. And oh how fast she grows.

I walk over to the tall windows and stare out at the moon through the bars outside. Harley was right, it was starting to feel like maximum security confinement being locked away inside this mansion. But what else could I do? There's just no way I can not be me. There's no way out of this life I've built for myself. No way out for anyone I love and care about. Harley's right also about how I mistook fear and weakness for love and loyalty. Caring wasn't a weakness, it was a strength. Lucy gives me strength. I would have died in the back of that car if it wasn't for my determination to live so I could be with my daughter. I finally understand the true meaning of the words I once spoke to Harley about living for me. Now I know what it's like to live for someone.

"It's punishment, that's what it is."

"I find it to be a rather romantic notion. It says something larger and deeper than just love."

"What do you know?"

I listen to Lucy's smacking and to the air going back into the bottle. She always seems to be in such a rush. Little Miss Impatient. I smile and look back down at her. Her eyes are open and she's looking at me with those icy blue eyes. Her tiny brows look like she's studying me and pondering a deep question or something. She's going to be a deep thinker. You could just see the adventure and life in her eyes. My eyes. I can't even describe the feeling of seeing yourself looking back at you.

My entire life, or the parts I remember the best, I can't ever recall a single bond to another human being. Not until Jeannie. But the bond I have to my beloved Lucy could never be rivaled or replaced. It was something that went beyond genetics. It was a feeling of being whole, being united with each other's body, mind, and soul. Absolute and unfalteringly perfect simpatico. The two of you make a complete force that just propels you both. Forward and beyond, always working together and never in opposition. How could I ever feel this way for anyone else? No. Lucy has stolen my heart. Nobody, nothing will ever be as important to me as she is.

"And it's your greatest weakness."

But I can't stop hearing Harley's words, 'how long can we live like this?'. Will we ever get to take her to a park? Will we go out as a family and get ice cream on Sundays? Will my child ever be able to ride her bike down the street? Will she get to go to school, or will she have to be tutored at home? Would she get to go to sleep overs and parties? Would she have lots of friends? Would there be any stupid boyfriends for me to scare away? Could she go to college? Could she peruse her passions? Could she make a better life for herself? Could she have her own perfect Kodac family?