South Park - Framed

PILOT

(Authors note // this is a pilot so Ik it's rly short but it's an idea of what might happen. It's like a little trailer)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You'll eat your words Kramer. Along with prison food" spat out the notorious Loretta Cardinal.

"Oh please honey you don't scare me" said Hanna and flipped her dark blonde hair. "Atleast my hairs actually blonde and not a terrible dye job like yours"

"Damn Loretta must've messed with Hanna again" whispered Stan to Kyle.
"Hanna's so fucking cool dude" said Kyle. "Too bad she'll never notice me like that.." he sighed.

"Yea bro don't get tor hopes up. Kenny's tried hooking up with her but she's not so easy"

"Yea she's got the fucking ass and titties of a model" said Kenny, muffled under his parka. "And she's an actual blonde which makes her even more attractive"

Cartman turned to them. "She eats cheesy pewfs like ah boss"

"Oh fatass what would you know about liking a girl?" Laughed Kyle.

"OI! I've had a girlfriend KYAHL" exclaimed Cartman.

"How long did that last?" Jokingly asked Kenny.

"God Loretta's such a fat ugly annoying bitch. Her hair isn't even a real blonde" said Kenny rolling his eyes.

"Damn Kenny you never shame a girl" said Stan.

"Well there are some that are just unfuckable because they're assholes. Hanna on the other hand..." started Kenny. "That hottie, she's just playing hard to get"

"Woah Kenny we're like 10 no ones fucking anyone here" said Kyle.

Hanna pulled out a pocket knife. "You leave my friend alone or I'll fucking scoop your eyes out with this thing"

Loretta seemed mortified, but still kept cool. "Fine, Kramer. You win this one. Here's your little shithole" she said and pushed a kid in Hanna's direction.

BUTTERS?! The hell did Hanna want with Butters?

"Uh gee thanks for saving me Hanna" said Butters, shaking.

"The fuck?!" Said Kyle.

~~~~

Hanna's POV:
Why the hell were they throwing me into this little interrogation room? And with the three musketeers and mcfatass?

"Interesting party. We've got the three musketeers, and mcfatass over there. Wonder why the fuck I'm here?!"

"Hanna?" Asked Kyle, surprised.

"We have footage of all 5 of you robbing Whole Foods" said the police officer.

"WHAT?!" Exclaimed Hanna. "I've done some pretty fucked up shit but I'd never rob a store, especially Whole Foods!"

"Probably not the best thing to say to a police officer" whispered Kyle.

"I can take care of myself MOM" said Hanna.

"Hanna Iris Kramer. You were suspected to be the mastermind of this scheme"

"I NEVER DONE ANYTHING"

~~~
(Juvy)

"This bitch put me in here so she's gonna pay" said Hanna. "B block better be prepared for war because A block is gonna kick ass"

"What size we talking about?" Smirked Kenny.

"Ugh. The ugly deformed gross kind that you dont wanna smash Kenny" said Hanna. 'I've learned how to talk to McPerv over there'

"Hell is upon Bitch Block because A block is gonna bring our A game"

"Those bitches better be prepared for war"