Eddsworld: Stuck with their biggest enemy (Torm Fusion)

Tom - Almost found out...

Tord was in a really bad mood now, just like I was. But hey, he had no reason to complain! It was just fair I messed with his stuff! He was the one who dropped all of my Smirnoff, so he should at least suffer as much as I did. It made everything easier to handle. Why should I be the only one who lost something valuable to me? We were fused forever, why should I be the only one who couldn't do what I wanted? Tord was selfish. Not only that, he was an idiot if he thought I'd just let him get away with things.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! THAT WAS THE BEST HENTAI IN THE WORLD... PREPARE TO DIE FOR THIS, JEHOVAH'S WITNESS!" he yelled.

I simply rolled our eyes. "Tord, I don't know if you remember this, but my mother is a bowling ball. How can she be a 'bitch'? That's impossible. It's almost as hilarious as when Edd's future self called Edd a son of a bitch. You should have been there..." For some reason deleting Tord's hentai had calmed me down a bit. But Tord, well... not so much.

He did the stupidest thing ever. Probably a lot stupider than anything I ever did. I know hurting ourselves doesn't make the situation any better since we share a body, but seriously? What was HE thinking, when he hit our nuts with the invention we still had in our hands? It was just a stupid idea. He wasn't really someone who did stupid things a lot because he what agitated, but I think it was because his hentai meant almost everything to him. Still, he called himself a genius. That alone proved he was anything but.

"AAAAAAAH!" we screamed in agony as the pain shot through our body. We had to bend over, otherwise, we couldn't handle it "What the hell is wrong with you?!" I hissed. "Matt! Edd!"
But we noticed in just a few seconds they showed no interest in our fight anymore, too distracted by all the buttons in Tord's lab. And I had the feeling it wouldn't end well if any of them were pressed.

"I LOVE buttons!" Matt smiled, side-eyeing a big red button in the middle of the room. "I wonder what this does?" He probably thought we wouldn't even notice if he pressed it. Well, I obviously didn't care all that much, but Tord did.

"M-matt, don't press that!" he shouted in fear, running towards Matt as quickly as possible. I was too surprised to run along with him, so I reluctantly let him control our body for that moment. Mainly because I didn't want to fall again. "I-it's dangerous!"

"Why is it dangerous?" Matt asked. I noticed Edd had spied something more interesting than the buttons. His mouth formed an O shape as he walked towards my bed. I realized too late that we should have hidden Tord's journal before they arrived. Edd bent down and picked it up. He immediately began flipping through the pages while sipping from a cola can. Oh crap! What if he saw the page with the healing serum and put two and two together?!

"T-tord... You should-"

"Not now, Thomas!" he growled. "I have more important business to attend to than you!"

"But commie, Edd is-!" I raised an arm to point to my bed, but he just pulled it back down immediately.

"You have deleted my hentai, Jehovah's witness, I don't see ANY reason why I should ever talk to you again!" See? That's the reason I hate him. He never listened to me, even when it was life-threatening. Okay, it's only one of the reasons, but you get what I mean.

We noticed Matt staring at us like we were an alien or something. "Don't you have better things to do?!" we asked, but due to Tord's anger, it came out as a hiss. He really needed to take a chill pill.

"Oh, yes I have!" he replied, immediately pressing the big red button. Tord made a strange noise I never heard him make before. I would have laughed if I hadn't felt his panic.

A strange machine came done, putting a hat on Matt's head. That was the Pickelhaube Tord wore all the time when we had joined the army, wasn't it. That was what this was all about?! Seriously?

A hat?!

Um... yeah...? What is wrong with it? Are you going to criticize my fashion choices as well now?

Why the hell DID you tell Matt it's dangerous then? Are you fucking serious? Edd is reading your journal right now and all you are worried about is that Matt presses that button and finds a hat?! Is that all you can think of?!

That's not import- E-edd is doing WHAT?!

"My hair!" Matt squeaked and threw the hat on the ground, his face showing his disgust. He pulled a brush out of his overcoat and began brushing his hair. We stared at him for a moment, lost for words. "Ew..."

"..."

"..."

"You were right, Tord! It sure IS dangerous... for my hair!" Matt cried, whimpering when his hair wouldn't let itself be turned back into its previous style. I couldn't see any difference, but he couldn't stop being a baby about it. He ran out of my room, probably to use some gel in the bathroom.

We need to get the journal before Edd finds out we're stuck like this forever. He would just freak out and then annoy us by trying to cheer us up later. I do NOT want to deal with that.

That's all obvious, Thomas. Tell me something I don't know. This is getting boring.

Ugh, just shut up, commie. I don't need your commentary.

I am not even speaking, I am thinking this. I could hear Tord's laughter in my head. 

We walked in Edd's direction, careful not to be too fast. If we grabbed it, he'd just get suspicious. He looked up from the journal to smile at us. Pleasedon'tseeit! Don'tseeit! 

"Wow, Tord. You really invented a 'personality changer'? This is so cool!" Edd grinned. 

He doesn't even know what that means!!

"Uh...Edd, why don't you give this back to us?"

"Yes, Edd. It's something... private. You wouldn't like a lot of this... hehe."

"Private?" he repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"It's some sort of... diary sometimes. Some things are very personal."

"Oh. Well, that explains why you wrote all this... perverted stuff under the gender swapper." He dropped the book on our bed. "You should probably see a therapist sometime..."

What the hell did you write there? And why did you even invent this, commie?! Who needs an invention like that?

Don't ask, you wouldn't understand it anyway, Tord sighed.