Eddsworld: Stuck with their biggest enemy (Torm Fusion)

Edd - Fuck you!

"I have never seen a weirder way to celebrate," Tord said, shaking his head in disbelief.

I frowned. "Why's it weird?"

"Well, you're drinking your stupid cola and all Matt does is look in his ugly mirror... This is just our every day life, Edd. That's not worth calling 'celebrating', it's dumb to call it a special thing," Tom added.

"But we are eating chocolate cake today!" Matt squeaked, looking at them for a few seconds before staring at his reflection again. "That's special! Don't act so rude..."

"It's not like you already do that daily..." The fusion rolled their eyes.

"Hey, that's not true!"

"Of course it is and you know that, Matt. There is no need to lie. You are almost as addicted to sweets as to looking at yourself."

I sighed. "Guys, could you please just stop arguing? We are celebrating because being you two being fused seems to have helped you to finally get along better." They made a face andI had to keep myself from chuckling."I don't have the time to deal with any other fights."

"Alright," the fusion sighed. "We won't fight with anyone."

"I mean, this is actually good for both of you. You are finally settling your differences to work together. This is great! When you aren't fused anymore you could possibly become friends!"

There was an awkward silence. The only thing we heard was Matt commenting on his looks and none of us enjoyed listening to him complementing himself. The fusion looked like they were about to vomit.

"Can I have a cola as well, please?" Tord asked after a while.

His question made me cringe, but then I glared at him. "No, you can't, Tord!"

"Why?" he whined.

"I am not sharing my cola with anyone!" I shouted, pulling my cola cans towards me, protectively putting my arms around them. I wouldn't let him touch my cola! Not after what he constantly pulled with bacon!

"There are at least thirty cans of coke in the refrigerator! You can't tell me you will drink all of them now!" Tord growled.

"Of course I will, it's cola!" I hissed.

"You told us not to fight less than a minute ago and now you randomly decided it's somehow worth it to fight over your cola," Tom muttered. "I honestly don't get your logic, Edd." He actually had a point, but I didn't want to admit that. Cola was the more important thing here.

"Shut up, Tom!"

"But it's true!" they shouted in unison. "There is no logic in what you are saying! You can't say one thing and do something completely against it the next!"

"Why me...?" Matt muttered, watching us with wide eyes, but none of us cared about him.

"If you want to drink cola, you should buy some yourself instead of asking for mine!" I hissed. Seriously, why couldn't he do that?

"I am not going outside looking like that!" Tord yelled, gesturing towards his body.

"I don't even like cola that much..." Tom muttered.

"Then why are you even arguing with me, Tom?!"

"Because I am bored out of my mind! I am neither able to play Susan like this nor am I able to do... anything else! The only thing we agree on right now is that we want to annoy someone to feel better about ourselves! And Matt is... Matt, so it's way funnier to mess with you."

I gave them a death glare. "Why are you so pissed all of the sudden? There's no reason to be angry."

"Oh, I don't know..."

"Maybe because we are stuck like this. With each other!"

"So what? It's not like this is forever or something... Just grow up!" I huffed.

"Well, actually it is," Matt replied.

"..."

"..."

"Is that... true?" I asked quietly, watching them in utter shock. How did they find out? How did Matt know before I did?

"Why did you have to say that Matt, just why?!" The fusion stormed out of the room as fast as they could and I heard them slam the door of their room shut.

"Such drama queens..." Matt muttered as he focused on his reflection again.

"So there is no way to turn them back..." I looked at Matt. "T-this... this is..."

"...Edd?" Matt asked slowly.

"...the best thing that could ever have happened!!!"

"Uh..." Matt stared at me before frowning at the cola cans. "Were those drugged...?"

"Just think about it! If they'd unfuse they wouldn't even try to get along anymore. They would just say, 'Let's forget this has ever happened and be enemies again'. But when they are fused forever they can figure out a way to get along with each other permanently. They HAVE to start helping each other!"

"Fuck you, Edd!"

I had probably shouted a bit too loud if they heard me like that...

"Edd, you sound like some kind of crazy scientist," Matt replied, looking at me with fear written all over his face. "And Tom and Tord will never agree with you about this..."

"You can't change my mind, this is not bad for them at all." I crossed my arms.

"...We... we should better check up on them..." Matt got up from the table. Matt who cared about himself more than anything.

"Since when are you the kind of person who cares about others?"

"I am acting like this because you are scaring me." Matt didn't take his eyes off me as we made our way to the fusion's room. I wasn't even sure if he blinked.