There are times when even the biggest enemies have to work together. When Tom stays instead of leaving, causing him and Tord to have an argument that ultimately leads to them inhabiting the same body, they are forced into a position neither of them...
Okay guys, before the chapter starts I want to thank TrixieDaDoggo. She has made some really cool fan art for this book.
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This is the first time I ever got fan art and I am so happy! (Fun fact: I was at a museum at that time and I randomly started laughing. The other visitors must have thought I was crazy)
Anyway, let's begin with the next chapter now.
We were trapped in a big, grey room without any windows, but add a control panel with lots of colourful, blinking buttons and it looks like some sort of control room. Matt and I were tied to chairs, our hands behind our backs. It was a really uncomfortable position. I couldn't even scratch my itching face.
Large Eyebrows had started talking with Tom and Tord on the phone while Chicken Wing Hair was reading the newspaper. A big article headline on the front page interested me the most: RedArmy took over big parts of Norway! Will Britain be next? Yeah, the media overreacted again. It happened all the time. I remembered when they told us to be careful because of the zombie apocalypse. It was never that bad, actually. That's why I never read the newspaper.
"Can I ask you a question?" I asked Chicken Wing Hair.
"You already have, stupid. And it depends on what question it is," he replied, not even bothering to look up.
"Can I have some bacon?"
"We are a terrifying army and we... we have kidnapped you! Why would we ever give you bacon?! You're our prisoner" he whisper-yelled. He almost sounded offended.
"Because if you don't I will annoy the hell out of you for as long as I am kidnapped," I responded with a smirk.
"More than you already do? That's not possible."
"Be quiet, Patryck! I am talking with Torm!" Large Eyebrows hissed in our direction.
I chuckled a little bit and looked at Matt who was examining the buttons in front of him with an expression that told me he was about to do something very, very stupid. And I couldn't wait to see what it was.
"Can I press one of those?" he asked and tried to point on the control panel. The rope kept him from moving his arms around though, so he just looked ridiculous.
"No, of course not! Why would I let you do that?! To try free to yourself?" Chicken Wing Hair asked, obviously annoyed.
"It would be in sat... uh... satire of kidnapping us!" Matt shouted, grinning proudly.
"Satisfaction, Matt," I corrected him, rolling my eyes. "Satire is something entirely different. It's comedy."
"But that's what I said!"
"Is he always like this?" Chicken Wing Hair asked me. I shrugged. I knew his name now, but calling him that was way more fun.
"Unfortunately, yes. But sometimes it's actually entertaining," I replied.
"Would you please shut the fuck up?!" Large Eyebrows yelled and ran to us with the phone in his hand. "Why are you even talking to these idiots, Patryck?!"
"Maybe it's because they are more competent than you are..." Chivken Wing Hair narrowed his eyes.
"You can't still be angry about your car," Large Eyebrows muttered.
"It was a fantastic new car! Did you even know how much I had to pay for it? And you randomly decided to drive it against our entrance! You have to be an idiot for that!"
Large Eyebrows rolled his eyes and held the phone next to my ear. "Your friend wants to talk to you apparently."
"Why not me?" Matt asked, his voice higher than usual from distress. "Why do they not want to talk to me? They do like me, don't they? Am I not popular anymore?"
"Shut up or I will hit you..." Large Eyebrows growled, making a step towards him.
"NOOO, NOT MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!" Matt screamed, throwing himself backwards in an attempt to hop away with the chair. He didn't move an inch.
"What the hell is going on where you are?" I heard Tom's voice over the phone. It was hard to understand him because Chicken Wing Hair was yelling at Matt to shut up.
"Oh, you know, the regular stuff. We are annoying them and Matt is worried about his face. Nothing special. It's actually kinda boring."
"I would be surprised if something else was gonna happen," they replied.
"Can I just shoot him?" Large Eyebrows put a hand on the gun on his belt.
"He's one of Red Leader's friends, Paul!"
"I don't think he would care if we killed one little-"
"No, Paul, no. Be a good boy."
"You seem to have a lot of fun," Tord said. "And they want to kill you. Even I didn't manage to make them want to do that. I applaud you for that."
"Good job, Edd... Wait Tord, you actually know them?!"
"Uh..." He would have a lot to explain when we got home. Can't say I feel any pity if that's the company he kept while he was gone.
"Yeah, they say he's the Red Leader or something. And that you kidnapped him, Tom. I'm not sure where they got that from."
"I wish I had really done it. So commie, you managed to become the leader of an army? I thought you were homeless all this time. Kinda sad you couldn't make me happy."
"Tom... do you want me to burn your guitar? With you glued to it, preferably?"
"If you do that..."
"You're pretty chill about me and Matt being kidnapped, huh." I huffed. Then I frowned at the crunching coming out of the phone. "Wait a second, are you... are you guys chewing? Are you eating... bacon?!"
"N-no!"
"Actually, we are."
"Tom! What the hell?!" Tord hissed.
"You can't be serious! I am trapped here with Large Eyebrows and Chicken Wing Hair while you are eating all bacon, Tord?! You son of a-"
"...Tord?" Patryck repeated. Oh. Oh, he heard that.
"Did he just call me 'Large Eyebrows'?" Paul looked at Patryck whose face had gone blank.
"Uh... bye Edd! Have a nice day!"
Patryck grabbed the phone out of Paul's hand and pressed it against his ear. "Red Leader?! Boss?! Hello?! Ugh, he hung up!"
Paul stared at the other man and I raised an eyebrow. "Why did you think I was talking with Tord?"
"You called him Tord, you idiot, that's why!" Chicken Wing Hair shouted. "And don't you dare calling me 'Chicken Wing Hair' ever again, my name is Patryck!"
"He's going to come soon, don't worry," Matt grinned. "And you guys will be surprised when you see him. Now, can one of you give me a mirror please? Getting kidnapped always ruins my hair style. What? Why are you looking at me like that?"
