Green Eyes That See Red (NEW! UPDATING WHEN I CAN - 2019)

Tearstains and different beds

(A.N: Smut to be expected, first one is cute but the second one might be uncomfortable to read as it's pretty rough and dominant).

It had been 3 weeks since Shelley ran off, everyone assumed her dead, even Roman began to slowly believe it which broke my heart as I tried to deny it myself. Peter was alive and well the last we heard before he suddenly packed up and left. A couple days after Shelley's disappearance, Letha had her baby at the White Tower, only both had tragically passed during the birth. Roman was finally broken hearted and Peter leaving because of his heartache only made it worse. I would sit with Roman everyday out in the garden to try to let the sun shed a small light on our suddenly grey lives and would sleep with my arms around Roman every night, only it was as if I was comforting a shell, there was no communication or life there. The only emotion he'd show would be when he'd cry at random points at night or during the day, often shaking whilst I held him, trying to hold back tears to stay strong for him. Once the tears were all out, there was nothing, no sign of anything. Olivia had found out who I was and it didn't bother her as much as I'd thought as I was comforting Roman 24/7. There was something she'd spoken to Roman about not long after Letha's death and he'd not looked me in the eyes since. I was suddenly scared.

It was Monday morning and I woke up to find Roman with a cigarette between his shaky fingers, like he'd been doing since Letha's death, gazing at nothing in particular out the window blinking very slow as if he was watching time pass. The rising sunlight highlighting the curves of his nose and beautiful lips, lighting up his green eyes I fell in love with that looked so heartbreakingly sad. I couldn't watch it any longer, it didn't exactly make a difference as much anymore when I held him or spoke to him about stuff I wasn't so sure about myself, we were becoming distant and I hated it. I wanted to give him some time alone but was also terrified to because I didn't know what he could do. I knew Roman well enough to know he could over-react and make irrational decisions at times, especially when he's not in the right mindset. We hadn't made love for just over two weeks, only twice, a couple days after Letha's death and the second of the two times was too rough, as if Roman was maddest he'd ever been before and had to take it out on someone.

~The first flashback to a couple days after Letha's death and Peter leaving~

Roman walked into the bedroom with dripping hair he'd not cared to dry after showering, his head was hung low as he slowly paced himself to the side of the bed, pulling the sheets back and getting in, lighting up a cigarette, the droplets of water from his hair, repeatedly dripping onto the flame from the lighter, putting it out. I noticed his eyebrows furrow in annoyance, so I grabbed a towel from the bathroom and gently rubbed it over his hair till it was no longer dripping, then used my lighter from the other bedside table to light his cigarette, it was the first time he'd looked at me in 3 days, I saw it, the pain, hurt, hopelessness ghosting his eyes. They changed to an almost apologetic look as his eyes locked with mine. I saw that loving look again.

I gently removed the cigarette from his lips and put it out in the ashtray beside him as he breathed out the remaining smoke through his nose, his eyes not moving from mine as his hands went to either side of my jaw, pulling me onto his lap, my thighs either side of him as our lips stayed still pressed against each other, not moving for a few seconds, just still but firm, my hands either side of Roman's neck. I waited for him to move first, he was so delicate at the moment that it was almost like the first time. Eventually I felt his lips move against mine, so I moved mine in sync with his. Soon it became needy and almost desperate as our tongues moved subtly, his hands moving to my waist, pulling my chest to his, my fingers tangling in his hair.

I felt Roman's oversized shirt I was wearing being unbuttoned, the feeling of Roman's fingers brushing my skin as he gently pushed off the shirt from my bare shoulders, I felt slight goosebumps forming on my skin as the cool air from the open window tickled my skin as well as the nerves I was suddenly feeling. Almost immediately I felt Roman's soft, warm lips make contact with my chest, kissing his way up to my neck, soft and gentle. When we'd both removed our minimum amounts of clothing, I slowly took Roman in as well as a soft gasp as my thighs were being grasped by Roman beneath me. I went slow and Roman was looking at me the whole time, he looked almost vulnerable when I thought of everything that had happened to him, his lips parted every so often and his breaths grew ragged as did my own. When we came to a finish, I lifted myself from Roman, the warmth leaving me as I climbed back into the sheets beside Roman, blowing out the candle beside me and wrapping my arms round his neck loosely as he moved a little down the bed so his cheek rested on my chest, the feeling of his cool teardrops on my skin.