EVERYONE LOVES LOKI (just a bunch of weird marvel oneshots)

some secrets are meant to be told.

okay soo quick a/n idk again if you guys listen to bts but they just had their comeback today and its just amazing! and im probably gonna be streaming for a while lol. but yeah so back to this chapter.

"TONY! DONT YOU DARE!"

"tony yes."

"tony, no."

"toooeenail yess."

"did you just call yourself toenail?" asked cap looking at the swiggling snakue like person before him.

"sssnakdeiure ahdkjfajdlkjdf." tony said before launching himself away from steve.

"hey pete you what do you want for dinner tonight?" asked rhodey.

"a will to live." rhodey looked at peter with wide eyes a little concerned. "hey man are you okay?"

"if by okay you mean ready to eat a whole pot of feathers then sure."

rhodey quickly left that room.

"SHURI! WE NEED TO GET THE EXTERMINATOR!" peter yelled craning his neck in an awkward position.

"but I thought we needed an exorcist?" she asked confused.

"no scott needs an exterminator, because he's a bug." peter explained.

"technically your a bug too." shuri trailed off.

"YOUR RIGHT! I NEED TO BE EXTERMINATED!" he realized.

"THOU SHALT NOT SEETH ANOTHER DAY ALDKJLFJALKJDKFJALSJFLKJ!" she yelled waving her arms about.

"SEE IF YOU CAN CATCHETH THE MIGHTY SPIDER OF GRAVITY!" peter shouted before jumping on the ceiling.

then as if all time slowed down.

splat.

he was covered in cake and icing.

this meant war.

soon enough the entire room was filled with the team excluding pepper and covered in cake, sauce and any food imaginable.

they were so competitive that they ended up not hearing the elevator ding and stop, or a good twenty kids and two older ladies step into the room with them.

"AHHHHH SHURI HELP CLINTS BEEN AKUMATIZED! MIRACULOUS LADYBUG LUCKY CHARM!" peter screamed at the top of his lungs picking up a red black spotted mask and putting it on.

" CATACLISM!" yelled shuri picking up the black mask and placing it over her face as well. then the two teens proceeded to inch closer towards the man.

suddenly after seeing they weren't able to corner the man peter jumped onto the ceiling and dropped down on top of Clint's shoulders.

"SHURI HE NEEDS SOME HOLY WATER!"

"LET THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELL YOU AND EXTRACT THE DEVIL FROM YOUR TAINTED SOUL!" shuri yelled holding a cross in one hand and throwing a bottle of water onto clint drenching him from head to toe.

"um."

everyone stopped.

there stood the most powerful woman of all time.

pepper, leading a class tour, peters class to be exact.

everyone's eyes widened, they were all frozen in place. and simultaneously they all said the same thing.

"oh crap."

then a piece of cake dropped from the ceiling, landing right atop of peppers head.

then peppers booming voice filled the silenced room.

"YOU WILL ALL BE CLEANING THIS ROOM RIGHT NOW! NO ONE IS LEAVING UNTIL ITS SPOTTLESS, I WANT LEVI TO BE ABLE TO COME IN HERE AND HAVE IT APPROOVED! she roared

and so that was the tale of how no one questioned anything ever again because they walked in on the avengers having a food fight.