The Perks of Being a Freak (Editing)

62. Well Shit

This was wrong.

I knew that what I was doing was wrong, yet I felt no inclination to stop. I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to move. I couldn’t tell if I was angry or happy or surprised anymore. All of my emotions were rolled together into one indistinguishable ball of tension and confusion.

Sitting on the roof of my own house was nothing new. I had climbed up almost every night since I first got my wings. It was from this roof that I first learned to fly. It was from this roof that I had watched my family live without me. Even before I had became a freak, I had gone to the roof to escape.

And unfortunately, this was not the first time I had sat up on the roof with him.

Simon lounged beside me, looking as if nothing was wrong. It was almost like we weren’t mortal enemies and he didn’t try to kill me every week. As if his friend Mitchell hadn’t almost killed Emily only hours ago. It was almost like we were friends. 

He shouldn’t be on my roof, so close to my sleeping, defenseless family.

And yet I wasn’t getting rid of him. I wasn’t fighting him or forcing him to leave or anything. I wasn’t protecting my family.

Instead, I sat next to Simon, staring at the sky. He was playing with a leaf, using his telekinesis to roll it around itself midair. 

Why didn’t I mind his presence? Why wasn’t I attacking him or running or warning my friends? What the hell was wrong with me? Was Tony right? Was I an adrenaline junkie? Did I have danger fetish?

“What are you so freaked about?” Simon drawled, not even bothering to look over.

“I’m nervous because the guy who had tried to kill me is sitting next to me on my roof, very, very close to my very human family.” I muttered darkly.

“Going for the humans would be a low blow,” Simon scoffed, waving away my paranoia. “And if I was going to kill them, I would have already.”

Why wasn’t I attacking him again?

“That sure does make me feel better,” I scowled and hugged my knees to my chest. Then I rolled back my head and looked up at the stars, winking in between the swatches of clouds. If Simon wasn’t on my roof (again), talking to me, I could be out, flying amongst the stars, wind in my feathers and hair. I closed my eyes and hummed happily.

“Why aren’t you afraid of me?” Simon asked, leaning towards me. My eyes shot open and towards him. “Why aren’t you attacking me or running away? We almost killed two of your buddies tonight. Sorry about that, by the way.”

“I’ve learned to control my fear, Simon,” I said, crossed my arms and leaning towards him defiantly. “You’re not so scary. And I’m not as violent as you think I am.”

“You have a pain fetish,” Simon grinned. I gasped.

“I do not!” My voice rose at least an octave.

“I heard Tony say it at the park a while back,” Simon teased, watching me turn twenty shades of red. “And he lives inside your head. It must be true.”

“No!” I cried, shaking my head. God damn Tony! 

Simon laughed, and then flicked his fingers towards me. The leaf he had been playing with shot straight at me and tangled in my braid. I glared and tugged at it.

“Bully,” I sniffed.

“Wimp,” he shot back, scooting slightly closer. Preoccupied with my braid and the leaf, I didn’t notice that the dangerous, deadly boy was only a little over a foot away from me.

“Lowlife,” I turned to face him, abandoning my braid, and sat crosslegged.

“Stuck-up,” Simon’s nose was only a few inches away from mine.

“Stalker,” I smirked crookedly. Despite my supposed hatred for the boy, I couldn’t deny that I liked flirting with him.

“Princess,” Simon growled, brows furrowed.

“Creep,” my eyes flickered toward his lips for a split second, and then I was angry with myself. He was evil! He was the enemy! I couldn’t even think about liking him!

But I did enjoy flirting with him.

And that was a very, very bad thing.

God damn it all this was so, so wrong! I hated myself for even talking to him!

“Loser,” Simon sounded a little bit breathless, and I had to fight the urge to chuckle.

“Douchedick,” without even realizing it, I licked my lips.

“Smartass,” I struggled to keep my eyes locked onto his. We were centimeters apart, and his lips looked soft and inviting. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to resist kissing him for much longer.

Bad Lia! Bad fucking Lia! Have some self control, and some self-respect!

“Puta,” I bit my lips, and Simon groaned. 

“Don’t go all spanish on me, Jewel,” he hissed.

I opened my mouth to retort, and to tell him not to call me Jewel, but couldn’t get the words out fast enough, because suddenly Simon wasn’t centimeters away anymore.

Fire spread through me, filling every inch of my body with delicious heat. I held his shoulders tightly and sealed my mouth against his. My skin ached sweetly where his hand touched my hip. Simon’s other hand was wrapped in my braid, tugging my head back so that he had a better angle, and the kiss deepened.

For a small, itty-bitty, fraction of a second, I realized that if Simon wanted to snap my neck, he would be able to do so easily.

But then he nipped my lower lip gently, and I moaned. Chills broke out across my shoulders even as another wave of heat filled me. It all felt so, so good. It was like a fairy tale.

And then the realization hit.

I was kissing Simon.

I was kissing Simon. Simon was kissing me. 

If this wasn’t betraying the Freaks, I didn’t know what was.

It was almost as if Simon had shoved me, and I had plummeted off the roof into an ocean of ice. I shot away, nearly tumbling off of the roof. Only Simon’s hand, tangled in my braid, kept me from crashing to the ground.

I panted, fingers digging tightly into the roof. “We can’t!” I wailed, looking over at him.

For a moment, I saw something flash in his eyes, and if I didn’t know Simon, I would have thought that he was hurt.

But I did know Simon, and I knew that he wouldn’t care about me, didn’t care about me and didn’t care what I did. He just wanted an easy lay, a way to mess with his archenemy.

And, unfortunately, I might be falling for him.