can i lay by your side|corbyn besson

32

Corbyn's pov

She's driving me crazy.

Her voice sent shivers down my spine and it killed me to just sit there. Normally, I would stare at her, not being able to pull my eyes away from her. But it was different.

It was like I was in my own Hell, watching my love sing with so much raw emotion, so much passion that she looked as though she was pulled into another world.

I wanted to cry. I wanted to sob because she was so perfect. The way she scrunched her nose made my body ache. I wanted to pull her away from the piano and give her all the love I could manufacture. I need to pull her into my arms and be as close to her as possible. That was the song she sang when I knew for sure I was in love with her.

It's just not fair.

I knew I loved her while she was with Aaron. I knew she wasn't happy and I just waited for her to realize how unhappy she was.

When she was upset in the slightest, it broke me.

When she was struggling to even stand after the break in.

When she talked about her parents.

Hearing her and Aaron fight.

Then watching her leave.

The night she told me what he did.

The night she told us what she did.

The pain and regret in her eyes.

It's not fair that she has to go through that alone. I love her more than anyone in the world and I know that for a fact. So why can't I love her?

She's my best friend. It's weird.

The fans would react bad. She doesn't deserve to get that hate. It could be more than when she joined the bands. There were some unhappy fans but now they love her. I mean, who wouldn't love her?

But I can't even think to let that happen to her. I need to stay away from her. I can't let my thoughts and emotions get the better of me and ruin our friendship.

But I want to show her my love for her.

The sadness never leaves her and I know it just waits for something bad to happen for it to come out again. She hides everything and I want to be the one she can let go of everything with.

I want to hold her as she cries and let's everything out. To hear what brings her pain and to know her weaknesses.

I tug on my hair and sit up in bed as I stare into the darkness.

I hear a knock on my door and quickly lay back down.

"Beanie?" Max whispers. I guess they finished the song. I hear rustling as she makes her way over to me and sits down beside me. I feel her run a hand through my hair and she sighs before planting a peck on my forehead. Don't do this to me. Please don't do this to me, Max. It's too late, a silent tear falls down my cheek. I hold back any noises though and keep my sleeping facade on. "Goodnight, Corbs." She whispers. I feel the bed rise again as she stands up and leaves my room.

Why?

Why does this have to happen? Why do I have to be in love with my best friend? My band mate for goodness sake!

I open my eyes again and roll over onto my back. More tears trace down my face as I think of Max. I picture her beautiful face. She never wears makeup, she doesn't need it.

I fear that if she does, it will cover what lies beneath. I think of the light freckles that adorn her nose and checks. Her green eyes invade my thoughts on the daily and they make me swoon.

That morning we danced and sang together was the best morning of my life. It was just the two of us, so close, so lovely as we smiled goofily at each other like we had been together for years. I don't know what she was thinking. She could've been thinking about anything but I know it could never compare to what I was thinking.

No words could ever describe how I felt other than love.

I love her.

I love her more than she can ever know.

God, I'm in love with Max Blair Sterling.

And all that thought does is tear me in half.

Because she doesn't even know it.