Letting Go

chapter 16

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Free at last, I just finished my last exam paper today and I need a week's rest to free myself of the exhaustion I feel. I have been studying at ungodly hours, eating more junk food than home cooked meal and waking up with papers scattered around my study table. I told Mo I would pass by her place after my exam, so I drive over to hers.

Monica is going on a date later on and she needs my help with deciding what to wear. This is the most indecisive woman I know, especially when it comes to clothes so I know this is going to be a long day. One would think this is the first time Jamie is taking her on a date due to how excited she has been. I wonder where he is taking her but we will just have to wait and see.

"I'm glad you are here, she has been driving me crazy. Her room looks like it's been hit by a hurricane" says Mo's housemate laughing.

I laugh walking to Mo's room and the first thing that welcomes me at her door is a pair of shoes. 'Can you tell me where Jamie is taking you that got you so worried' that's the first thing that I say walking in her room.

"We are having a double date with Mariah and her boyfriend. We are going to the theatre then later go to dinner at this new restaurant that Mariah mentioned"

This is the first time I see Mo so stressed out about a date. As for what to wear I am used to it but not this kind of stress that I see right now. This causes me to put a big smile on my face, it's a sign that Mo is really serious about this relationship with Jamie.

'At what time do you have to be ready anyway?'

"He is picking me up at six"

'We still have time, if we don't find something in an hour we will go shopping' Mo's smile makes me wish I didn't say the word 'shopping' she is the only person who could keep up with Lily. They could shop all day without breaking a sweat.

"You are such a genius, why didn't I think of going shopping before"

She begins putting her clothes in her closet and I go to help her. "How was your last paper?"

'It was okay I guess, I'm just glad I'm done with it'

I'm thankful Mo didn't throw all her wardrobe on the floor because we would still be occupied. I don't know why she thought it was a great idea to take out almost half her closet. We continue folding her close while talking about the mystery date. She is worried about what to wear because Jamie usually tells her where he is taking her.

......................

An hour later we are back from the shopping mall. Apparently Mo just wanted me to go shopping and knew I might say no. After shopping we rushed home because Mo had only two hours to get ready and knowing her she will be late.

While Mo takes a shower I text Noah telling him I'm visiting them tomorrow. He was happy to hear this, I have been distant and he really does not deserve how I have been towards him. Noah and I used to be super close, he was the only person we knew when we moved to New York and as my brother he took us under his wing. He was our tour guide and showed us the hot spots in New York, at times we would hang out with him and his friends over the weekend.

Since Lily's passing I have been a shitty sister and daughter. I have been so angry at the world that I'm pushing most people away. It breaks my heart to be here all alone, she should been here with me teasing Mo about her being in love. She would be planning her career as a fashion designer with Hailey's help and about to take the world by storm.

"Hey are you okay," Mo says scaring me.

'Damnit Mo, you scared the shit out if me when did you get here?'

"I tried calling you few times but you were in your own world. Are you okay, you don't look well"

" You were thinking of her" She states

'I just miss her so much Mo' I sniffle

"I know love, I miss her just as much. She would be teasing me so much if she saw me all mushy mushy in love" Mo says between a laugh or cry and hugs me.

'Let's do your make-up, Jamie will be here in no time'

We enter her bedroom and I do her make-up in silence, each in her own head thinking. Mo is by far the only person I have talked about when it comes to Lily, she was her friend just as much as she was mine and I don't have to explain certain things to her because she understands.

"Have you told your mum that you are going to Italy?"

'Nope, I will tell her when I get home. Did you decide if you are going home with me or staying with Jamie?'

"She will not be happy to hear your plan. Jamie said he thinks I should go home then come back to celebrate new year's with him" she explains smiling ever so brightly. Jamie is not spending Christmas in Florida, his parents are divorced so he will be here in New York since he has work and all.

'Thank God I booked your flight even though you were hesitant. As soon as I'm back I will come see you before our lives get busier'
We laugh, making silly jokes while Mo finishes up. It's almost six so Jamie could be here at minute now. I hear a knock after a few minutes and Jamie walks in holding flowers for Mo.

'Be safe kids, and don't do anything I wouldn't do' I shout as they close the door behind them.

.....................

Later that evening I go to bed after eating leftover pizza that we ordered the day before with Mo. I'm watching romcom on Netflix,I get lost in the movie then shut the laptop and go through some pictures in my phone.
It's pictures of the three of us,Mo,Lily and I that we took a day before Lily's accident. We were so happy that day, we had so many plans together, but life happened and plans changed.

I hear my phone and my brother's name appears.
'Hey Noah' I say as soon as I hit the answer button.

"Hey pumpkin, about our plans tomorrow. Hailey's parents called and they invited us for lunch so we will have to cancel our plans"

'It's okay enjoy lunch with the in-laws' I tease him laughing.

"We will be back late in evening, we can come pick you up when we get back then sleep over at ours"

'No that won't do, I have plans with Mo later. I visit you guys before going back home. I booked a flight for Saturday '

"Are you sure?"

'Yes, now stop going all big bro on me. Say hi to Hails'

"Ok fine, have a goodnight"

'Night'

I am just happy Noah doesn't pity me like people in Florida. They are walking around egg shells around me like I will break or something and I hate it. That is why I decided that going to Italy is exactly what I need. I go to sleep thinking of how I will spend my day tomorrow now that Noah cancelled.

Maybe call Hayden.

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