AT MY BEST

Thirty-Seven

The next few days were hard. The man I had spent five consecutive years with was gone. He was flawed and caused a lot of turmoil in my new relationship, but his crimes didn't match his punishment. He didn't deserve his life to be taken over $100 and a Cuban Link chain. I couldn't help but think his tragic demise came at a time where he was possibly turning a new leaf. During our conversation on the phone he finally owned up to the hurtful things he had done to me. He even wished me well with Jordan. My heart hurt not only for him but for his children.

Seeing his kids, mainly his daughter Zuri was bittersweet. She was a reminder of his past cheating, but also the sweet little angel he left behind. My heart filled with joy when she turned around and gave me a big smile and waved while at Jarvis's funeral. Keyonna or Sweet Pea turned around to see who the stranger was her daughter was playing with. Realizing who it was I could see the wave of different emotions come over her face. But the one that was most visible was heartbreak. Regardless of the lies and deceit her and Jarvis's relationship started off of, it was clear he meant more to her than he had put on during our phone call. I could tell she was searching for words to say, so I quickly placed my hand on her shoulder and gave it a squeeze letting her know everything was going to be ok. She smiled through the pain and mouthed Thank You, before turning around rocking her baby.

I was so thankful to have Jordan here with me. Having to see Keyonna for the first time since I found out about her and Jarvis, and seeing the child he kept from me for most of our relationship would have been too much to handle alone. Him being here to support me meant the world to me. Especially after everything that transpired the past few months. I told Jordan about the conversation I had with Jarvis in Hawaii. That night Jordan was able to forgive him in his heart.

Continuing to let the past be the past, at the burial I held on to Keyonna as we tearfully placed Roses on Jarvis's shiny black casket. During this somber moment I couldn't help but to notice how natural Jordan was holding Keyonna's son Jaylen while playing with Zuri. I swear he was meant to be somebody's daddy......He can be my Zaddy Ton- My thoughts were getting the best of me. I forgot I was at a funeral and not the confines of my home. Apparently I was so caught up in my thoughts I didn't notice everyone heading to there cars for the repast. I felt a tap on my arm and turned to see it was Keyonna.

"Looks like you got yourself a good man. I'm happy for you Giselle." Keyonna said glancing at Jordan and the kids, then smirking at me.

" Thank you! I think so too."

"What does he do anyway?"

"He's a pediatrician. So I guess you can say he's naturally good with kids."

"Oooh! That's who Jay was talking about." I tilted my head in confusion.

"Jay said you was seeing somebody new. He ain't say you bagged a doctor though I see you girl. After the shit we put you through you deserve a decent dude in your life....Karma came and bit both of us in the ass. All the craziness we did he and I deserve how we ended up. Dead, Shot and a Single Mother."

My heart nearly shattered hearing her say that she deserved this. Because that wasn't true. A man's failure to keep his penis to himself was not enough for him to deserve death. Maybe a Lorena Bobbitt situation but not this. And she didn't deserve to be shot either. She was in the car when it happened. She was shot in the arm while the robber was running away still firing his gun. The kids were staying with a relative that day thank god.

"No. Y'all didn't deserve this at all. I was hurt when everything happened, and for months I was broken. But I forgive the both of you for everything. I know happiness seems like a foreign object to obtain right now, but that's what I want for you. That's what you deserve."

Before I knew it Keyonna pulled me in to a hug. She was squeezing me so tight I didn't know whether I should fight her ass or hug her back. But as she showered me with thank you's I decided to hug her back.

"Let me get my kids, I know y'all ready to go. But thank you Giselle! You really are a nice person."

"Thank you, and keep your head up. You'll get through this."

And that was my last words to her before Jordan and I left to go back home. Well back to Devyn's place. The old home had been sold already and Dev was more than happy to let Jordan crash with us until the home Jordan had purchased was ready. Until then I was stuck with Beavis and Butthead.

The next morning while Jordan and Devyn went to the gym I decided to go to the doctor. I had been feeling uneasy almost every morning and had trouble keeping food down, yet I also had problems saying no to food. I thought maybe I was just eating my feelings and didn't need to see a doctor, but Jordan being a doctor thought I could have a Stomach Bug since I had been throwing up, but still wanted me to see my doctor because the sickness was too consistent.

"Alright Giselle I have you're test back."

"Tell me Dr. Jackie, What crazy illness do I have, I'm ready to hear it."

"Well I hope that's not what you call it. I'm surprised Jordan didn't put two and two together in the first place, That Hawaii heat in December must have fried his brains."

"Oh! Gosh What is it!?" I asked reluctantly.

"Girl you are not sick. You're just.............."

Several hours later I was back home. I had avoided coming home after the news I just got. I went shopping instead buying stuff for a house I didn't even live in yet. I just needed to clear my head. Once I got home Jordan kept asking me what was wrong. I told him it was just gas, not feeling it was the right time to say what was really going on with me. He didn't exactly believe me but once he noticed I was in a mood he dropped it.

While Jordan slept, I went into the bathroom. I ran the water and played music like I would when I took a shower so Jordan wouldn't think anything of it. Chloe was the only one who answered her phone when I called. Scottie was in Cuba on her honeymoon and JT was probably somewhere cussing Reggie out.

"What's going on bossy lady !?"

"Hey Chloe please tell me you're alone!"

"Uhh! Yeah what's going on babe? Everything alright!?"

"I'm about to tell you something but you can't say anything to anyone. You understand me!?"

"Sure mom I hear ya! What is it girl!?"

"I went to the doctor today. Chloe!...... You're going to be a auntie!" I said with the biggest smile on my face.

"Ohhhhh! My! Gaaaaawwd!"

I had to cover the phone because Chloe screamed so loud. I paused to make sure Jordan didn't hear anything. Once the coast was clear I continued.

"You can't tell anyone. Especially not Jatavia she can't hold water. At least not for another month."

"Okay! Okay! But why a month?"

"I want to announce it at Jordan's Gala he's hosting for the Clinic. Both our parents will be there and all of our friends."

"Uh! I'm so fucking excited. It's like everything is falling in place for you two. Though I loved the Spa day, I can't help but think how great it would've been if you guys got engaged that night as planned."

"Wait what did you just say!?" I questioned.

"Oh Shit! Uhhhh! I gotta go girl, Bye!"

Did this girl just say what I think she did? Did Jordan really plan such a special weekend for an engagement all for it to be ruined? And how did I miss that. We were doing so well at that time, an engagement was almost inevitable. All I know now is I have a piece of Jordan growing inside me and whether the opportunity for us to get engaged came now or later I was happy either way. I went back to bed cuddling up to a still sleeping Jordan. I kissed him on the tip of his nose and on his lips before thanking God for bringing us back together. Moments later I drifted off to sleep in his arms.