Scars We Bury || On Hold

19// New Year's Eve

Chapter 19

"This is love but it hasn't been discovered yet." ~H.W

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Luke.....
Monday December 31, 2015
After a lot of convincing and persuading from Nate, Jimmy and Aaron and I decided to go to that party knowing that it would be so meaningless and boring. There will be nothing for me to do. I will just have a couple of drinks and then I will go home or maybe spend the night with the boys. I bought my black suit, shoes and I shaved my beard. Everything is all ready and set for tonight. All that is missing is just the girl I should escort to the party and with Scar out of town, I have no one to escort. I guess I will just go solo for the first time in my history. I never really went alone to that Christmas Party. I always had someone to take with me but I guess that after meeting Scar, no girl other than her seems to appeal to me.

I also did some christmas shopping. I bought a gift for my mother. I bought her some red dress as a christmas gift. And of course I didn't forget Scar, I bought her a necklace which I think that she will like. Maybe I won't get the chance to give it to her today on Christmas Night but I put it in my car in case I drive her back from the airport after 2 weeks, I would remember to give it to her. I just hope that she is having a good day with no pain and crying.

A few hours later.......
9pm......
I took my hot bath and I wore my new black suit. I put my perfume, the one that would attract girls just to save my prestige nothing more. I kept my hair loosened in a messy way and I adjusted everything. I gave my mother her gift and she was over the moon then I took my car and now I am at the party having a couple of drinks. I am leaning my back on the bar, both hands rested on it when Megan approaches me.
"Hey, Lukey!" She says as she comes in front of me. She walks closer to me leaving no space between us. She leans in on my chest and she whispers "She dumped you of course." I take a deep breath. I slowly push her away from my chest "What do you want, Megan?" I ask her aggressively, crossing my hands. She puts both of her hands on my chest and she brings her lips closer to mine that I could feel her breath on my face. "I want you." She says, her hands wondering around my chest. I grab her hands forcefully and I throw them away from my chest. "You had me but now it's over."

"Are you choosing that broken bitch over me?" She says frustrated and I feel my blood boiling. She doesn't know that bitch she is referring to is way better than she will ever be. She doesn't know that the girl she is calling broken bitch is one of the strongest girls that I have ever met. I look at Megan with disguest in my eyes then I turn around to go.

"She is perfect for you, you know?" She says and I turn around again.
"You two are broken. Good luck breaking each others hearts."

"Being broken is way better than being fake." I say then I leave her and I make my way outside the party. I dial Scar's number but her phone seems to be turned off. I sigh in annoyance before I lit one of my cigarettes and start smoking. How I wish Scarlett was here with me now. She would be wearing a sleevless long cherry red dress that would be showing her collarbone perfectly. Her hair would be loosen and flying in the air while strands of her hair are lying on her forehead. She would have a red lipstick covering her lips making it hard for me not to kiss her. And best of all, she would have that beautiful smile on her face. That beautiful smile that makes her ocean blue eyes glow. Ugh! Fuck that party!

11:30
29 minutes... just 29 minutes and the count down will start which means a new year will start too. If you ask me what have you gained and what have you lost. My answer would be: I gained Scar and I lost a part of my humanity. A part of my humanity was killed like the part of my childhood and like the upcoming part of my teenage. If you ask me whom do you want to start this new year with, I would tell you that I would choose two persons, my mother and Scarlett. If you ask me whom do you want to start this new year without, I would tell you that I would choose my father of all people cause he is the reason of everything I have been through. He has caused me so much pain but that pain is nothing compared to my mother who has spent 20 years of her life with a man who turned out to be anything but a man. The greatest pain is when you get deceived by the love of your life. When you imagine for yourself a bright future and then suddenly all your imaginations turn out to be just dreams. Dreams that will never come true. Thank you for ruining our life father.

I walk through the crowd and I stand looking at the sky and not at the count down screen. I am watching the stars and I wish she was here to watch them with me. It could have been different. I would have been holding her hand now, a smile would have been drawn on both of our faces as we admire the stars. I don't know my feelings. I am not sure of them and I can't label them but If she believes in love at first sight then this is it. This is love but it hasn't been discovered yet.

11:59
The count down starts and I am standing in the crowd with just a glass of whiskey in my hand. I am standing alone between a whole crowd of couples, holding hands or sucking each other's faces off. And while I am busy envying them, I feel a warm hand sneaking to mine, entangling fingers with mine. I look beside me and it's like a dream came true. Before I can speak or say anything, she hushs me and she holds my hand tighter. She gives me the sweetest smile ever before she brings her sight to the moon light. Is it really true! Or Is it just an illusion?
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HAPPY NEW YEAR!.