Your friend pretends like they're going to hit you. You flinch and turn away.
They laugh. "Ha you flinch so easily y/n"
Little do they know, sometimes in order to punish you, your parents give you a smack across the head. Now I know, a smack across the head isn't bad. But when it leads to the face, and then getting kicked, that's when it's bad.
Now, I'm not trying to attract sympathy because I know there are people out there who have it a lot worse than I do. I'm trying to make something people can relate to so they don't feel as alone.
Examples include my dad. He claims its "just playing" or it was "an accident". My mum, not so abusive, physically. My dad's more verbally abusive towards me than physically. Same as my mum. I can recount the times my dad has physically hurt me.
When i was 4 years old, I did something to annoy my 2 year old sister and my dad kicked me until my mother pulled him off of me, which was around 2 minutes. I can still remember the feeling of his foot digging into my ribs and my shoulders.
When i was 9/10 my dad punched me in the arm, causing it to bruise just because I turned the TV up.
From the age of 7 my dad would beat me with the metal part of his belt causing the back of my legs to bruise. This went on until I was around 11.
When i was 12, I pulled my sister's hair when i was getting off the ground and she claimed I did it on purpose when I didn't. My father came out yelling and shouting at me and slapped me so hard across the face, I fell to the floor.
After that he was no longer physically abusive.
He became verbally abusive.
I am so afraid of my father and he doesn't realise the damage he's done.
He scared me while I was in the shower one time. I was shaving my legs so I retaliated and said "I'm shaving my legs, Incould have cut myself" he responded with, "So? Why would it matter? You cut your arms anyway"
The last thing I remember him verbally abusing me about was when my dog had recently passed.
I was patting my cat and my dad blurted out, "Why do you have to be so annoying? That's probably why the dog died, because you annoyed him so much and didn't want to deal with you"
There's probably a lot more he said, but my brain is currently not functioning properly so I really have nothing left to say.
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In Order to Stay Alive, I Think I Have to Kill My Mind
Non-FictionTRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ This is your trigger warning. Please do not read any further if you are easily triggered. I began writing this book in 2018 when I was at one of the worst times in my life. I am still writing it in 2020, and am hoping to write i...
