∞♡∞
I turn and toss in bed, not even trying to sleep anymore. The vintage clock on my night stand reads 3.36 AM, and I went to sleep at around ten, a little while after Connor had left. Although he's on my mind constantly, he's not the reason I can't sleep.
His condition didn't come as a surprise, somehow it was to my knowledge all along. Something about him always getting distracted and the sadness of his eyes... I've known he has issues since the day I met him, but in a way, I like him even more now. I like that he's not perfect, that he feels pain like normal people do, that I can be myself around him. Well, sort of.
Jess is still mad at me, but I've done everything I can. I've tried calling her and texting her, I've talked to Lauren... what more does she want from me?
The clock strikes 3.50. I lean over the edge of my bed and search the floor beneath until I feel the cool glass brush against my fingers. The whiskey burns the inside of my throat as I swallow it for the second time tonight, and I just barely prevent a cough from escaping my lips. I don't drink much, not even a mouth full, just enough to help me fall asleep for a few a while. At 4 I pick up my phone and call Connor.
"Hey, are you ready early?"
"Quite the opposite... I'm not going to the café today, I haven't even slept ten minutes," I slur, and even though I'm really drunk because seriously, I cannot hold my liquor, it only sounds as if I'm tired.
He yawns. "That's fine, I'll see you tomorrow, Sunflower."
"Yup."
The next time I open my eyes sunlight beams in through my windows. I stretch out my arms above my head, my eyes fluttering open. I check the alarm clock, which says 6.32.
"Shit!" I jump out of bed, grabbing the clothes closest to me. I shrug on a pair of slim fit jeans, a t-shirt and-
The flannel shirt slips out of my hand and onto the floor. I feel tears burn in my eyes and frustration makes my hands shaky. Honestly, there's no real reason I can't wear these clothes to school, a lot of other popular girls do. I guess it's scary because that's who I actually am. Maybe. I've pretended to be this stale painting for so long I have no idea what's real anymore, or if there really is a real me. But I know one thing for sure; if I go to school wearing what I want to wear, read the newspaper, talk about how John Lennon totally took the credit from McCartney on so many of their records, there's no hiding anymore. Everyone will see into my disgusting interior, they'll see how it's rotting, and I'll be back to square one.
Instead, I grab a crop top, pretty cute considering I hate crop tops. No breakfast for me this morning, just a twenty-minute drive and four hours until lunch. Great.
♡
I rush into the cafeteria after barely surviving third period. I rush over to Jess and Adam, noticing they look quite bored without me.
"Guys, guys, guys! You will not believe this-" I stop mid-sentence, seeing as two pairs of eyes are glaring daggers at me. "What?"
Jess yawns. "Oh, nothing. We just couldn't care less about what's going on in your life, since we're apparently not interesting enough for you either."
"That's not true! Come on, you know I love you gu-"
She gets up, not even looking at me. "Whatever. See you in chemistry."
My wide eyes go to Adam, who's looking at me as if I made Jess go on her little spat. He leans his head on the palm of his hand and sighs.
"I know it's not intentional, but sometimes you can be a real bitch."
YOU ARE READING
Coffee at 5 AM √
Teen Fiction"Wait," I put my hands on my hips and frown. "You woke me up to ask me this? Because you want to meet me every morning at five?" "Yes." "So you honestly expect me to throw away three hours of perfectly good sleep just to have coffee with you?" He r...
