Angels Cry (Before You Exit - Toby Mcdonough)

Chapter 63

AN: okay so some of you guys thought that I should not just end it at chapter 62 because you guys wanted to know more so I decided to think about it and wanted to do one last chapter then after this, it would be the end. This is kind of the epilogue and yeah.. I hope you guys enjoy it :)

SHOUTOUT TO @dream__catch :D stay beautiful and awesome :D

Toby's P.O.V

It has been two months already since her death. I still could not get that scene out of my head and every time I think about it, it just makes me mad and upset like I should have done something to it. Or like this was all my fault for not taking good care of her. I know that it is not mine because everyone keeps telling me that. I would sometimes cry to sleep because of her presence not with me or just the thought about that she is not here on earth with me. 

It sucks you know? 

But, I am trying to move on. And since I could not even face to go to school, I decided to take up online school just to get away from the memories we had in school. I miss her so much. She wrote all her emotions in a box full of letters and hid it away from me, not until now that she is gone and her mum found it under her bed, she said to give it out to everybody. I would often read it when I am thinking about her, and it was like a happy little pill or some sort of thing to let me know that she is still with me; right beside me actually. 

I try to be strong for her though, and I hope she sees that, that I am struggling to be strong and not weak. She told me that what is keeping her strong is me, and now she is trying to do the same for me except with a bunch of letters written from her. 

"Toby?" I heard my mum's voice spoke from behind me. For a moment there, I thought it was her, but then to think about it she is not here. I do wish she is though. 

"What?" I asked, clearly not in the mood to do anything. Yes I am a boy, I do have my up's and down's moments and those crazy mood swings you girls have to. I have feelings too. 

My mum sigh, "You know can't always be a wreck and rot in here forever right?" 

Now it was my turn to sigh, "What do you expect me to do, mum?" 

I could feel her shrugging, even though I was not looking at her. "I don't know. Go outside or hang out with your friends? Get some fresh air! The atmosphere down here is all so gloomy." 

"Fine." I replied. I heard the door shut and I immediately thought, who should I hang out with? Well I do have a couple of school friends to hang with. I guess I should hang with them. Grabbing my phone off the desk, I text them in the group chat we made and waited patiently for their replies. Seconds later, my phone started to go off crazy and I chuckled. My friends are so crazy weird and wild. 

They all responded with a "yeah, sure" and many spammed emojis. I laughed at the messages they sent and it felt like it has been a long time I have not laugh in awhile. My happy mood finally came back. 

Hurriedly I took a quick shower and dressed in casual clothes. Some beige shorts and a white shirt with a grey beanie along with my favourite pair of black vans. I was ready to head out to meet them. I went to recheck the group message and they said to meet them at the mall, our usual hangout place. Snatching my wallet and filling it with some cash I saved up and my phone, I was out of the door but of course, I kissed my mum good bye. 

Luckily I had on my earphones so I would not be lonely and music was my company. I pivert turn to my left and looked at her house. There was lights on and someone's car parked on the driveway, I guess aunt Clarice has some guest over. All of a sudden, a wave of flashback memories came flooding back to me and it was like I got stab in the chest hard. I miss her laughter and the kisses she always gives me whenever I am mad at her (not really that mad though). She knows how to bring a smile upon my face.