Oh, glazed eyes, empty hearts
Buying happy from shopping carts
Nothing but time to kill
Sipping life from bottles
Tight skin, bodyguards
Gucci down the boulevard
Cocaine, dollar bills
And...
My happy little pill
Take me away
Dry my eyes
Bring colour to my skies
My sweet little pill
Take my hunger
Lie within
Numb my skin
Like a rock afloat
Sweat and conversations seep into my bones
Four walls are not enough
I’ll take a dip into the unknown, unknown
Happy Little Pill/ Troye Sivan
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(A/N sorry if some medicine facts are wrong... I'm not a doctor so idrk.)
Luke' POV
Wednesday 8th September.
I've had 12 tablets in 14 hours. If you lift me up and shake me, you'll probably hear them rattling in my stomach.Because it's only been 2 doses it hasn't taken affect. But hopefully it will soon. I'm not too sure how I'm feeling about it all. One part of me is relieved that I have gotten help where as the other is sort of like 'this is stupid'. I'm feeling better today. We went to go and see Ashton this morning and made an appointment for next week to see Dr Simpson which I was ment to do yesterday but... I forgot. Calum and Michael are being very supportive. Calum has definitely talked to Michael because otherwise Michael would be making fun of me. In a joking way, obviously. Anyway, Ashtons levels have dropped even more. It really is not looking good. And that makes me upset. I try not to think about it because it hurts knowing he could die any second. We could literally get a phone call saying he has passed away. I hope I never get that call. Sorry. I don't want to think about that. I do miss him alot. It's strange having your best friend in hospital. Michael tweeted to tell everyone we are having a short break for a while. We just have to watch out that we don't get seen too often without Ashton or if we get seen going to the hospital. But I suppose we could say he has had to go back to Australia for personal reasons even though that would be lying. I will admit I have used the scalpel. I guess I will just have to see how it goes. Michael and Calum still don know anything about it. I guess that's for the best. Ashton's mum is coming tomorrow with his brother and sister. She said she wants to make it a sort of holiday for Harry and Lauren seeing as it is their first time in London. I'll be next to Ashton for as long as I can be.
Dear Ashton,
Keep fighting. We are both gonna be okay. I promise. Your levels have dropped even more today. That makes me upset. I'm sure you'll pull through, I promise. The doctor came round when we were visiting this morning and told us even if you wake up you might not be able to remember alot of things. I guess it's like waking up with Amnesia. Who would write a song about wanting to wake up with Amnesia? Haha, that would be us! I guess maybe these pills are working already for me. I don't really want to be taking antidepressants. It's like relying on medicine to make me happy. Why can't I keep myself happy? But maybe it will help me find my own happiness. Until you wake up, it's just Michael, Calum, myself, and my happy little pills. (But they aren't really little, they're kinda big. They get stuck in my throat. Anyways, I'll show you when you wake up) Get better soon, Ash.
YOU ARE READING
Falling To Pieces
Genç KurguI watched his lifeless body lying there connected up to various machines trying to keep him alive in the dark wards of the now-familiar hospital. The loud noises of his every breath scared me-but relieved me at the same time. I turned around to look...
