Suicide constantly runs through my head. I can't get rid of it. No matter how hard I try. No matter how much I do to be happy. No matter how many smiles I fake hoping they turn into real ones.
It's always there, the most loyal thing in my life. It's calling my name, wishing for me to just take my life already. I want to listen, I'm just waiting for the right time. Only the best execution to satisfy the demons within.
Pleasing other people is my job, it's what I live for. Without that I'm nothing. People don't seem to need me anymore. I only get in the way now. Guess it's my time to go.
I'd rather be dead than feel useless, like I don't belong. Because right now that's all I am, that's all I have been, that's all I ever will be. I've served my purpose, now it's time for me to go.
Suicide is coming soon, just wait.
-JT
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Randomrandom thoughts from my depressed suicidal brain This is my way of coping. I'm learning to rant on wattpad instead of cut, binge purge...etc. Also, most of the time when I'm writing this stuff I'm upset and have no regard for spelling and grammar ch...
