Done

"Dad" part 1

Hey dad. You've been awake for a couple days. We texted every day since. Before that we hadn't talked at all. Like, in months. Ha. Never thought that would happen. But hey, here we are. I was hurt. I cried. I was angry. And you were evil. I hated you. I hated you so much that I was just mad all the time. You broke something inside of me. Something so irreversible that it can never heal. I was so upset all the time. I took it out on others and myself. But don't worry about me because I had the people that I need in my life and you are no longer one of them. I finally excepted that. After so many countless nights of crying myself to sleep. I was finally okay without you. And then all the stupid hospital stuff happened and you wake up and all the sudden you're having a come to jesus moment. It's like you think you can just wake up one day and decide to walk back into the life like I'm just some girl. Well guess what, I'm not okay. I'm your daughter. You're own flesh and blood. I deserve to be treated with love and respect. But it feels like I never got that. Not from you at least. But I don't need you, I thought I did but I didn't. I'm finally happy again since the day I realized you weren't coming back. But no. I don't get that. I don't get to be happy for a long time because something always comes storming in to ruin everything. And this time the storm was from you. I hope you know that you are the reason for my pain at this moment. I hate how much control you have that you're just able to waltz back into my life. And for one second, I felt hopeful. This tiny part of me thought that maybe, just maybe , you were back to being my dad again. All was gonna be well because I was getting my dad back. And my ride or die was getting her bestfriend back. But life doesn't work like that.