Let Me Love You Again

Chapter 2: Present Time

Are you listening to anything I'm saying, Deanney?" Neil's annoyingly girly voice broke my memory. I pulled the shake away from my mouth, and gave her a smile.

"What were you saying?" I asked, not really caring if he was mad or not. He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I was asking if you still were in love with her." I felt my chest sting slightly the words that were obviously referring to Jessica. I tried not to let Neil notice this though as I took another sip of my shake.

"Of course I do, Neil... What sort of question is that? I've always loved her and probably will always love her." I looked at him and noticed the look on his face; you know that one where people thought you were the stupidest person alive? Yeah, that same look. "Don't give me that look. Why are you such a dick to me when I talk about her? How would you like it if I said shit about Orlando?" His face got cold when I mention his boyfriends name. 'How does that feel then hm?'

"That has nothing to do with this and you know it." He snarled at me. I couldn't help but laugh at that though.

"Oh it doesn't? Because, it sure seems like it does. He cheats on you every day, yet you preach to me to get over Jessica... at least she never cheated on me." I glared at him, knowing I struck a nerve there. The look on his face was painful as he dropped his burger on his plate and leaned back against the booth, not looking at me now. I sighed as I now felt extremely guilty. "I'm sorry, but sometimes you forget you're not perfect yourself, Neil." He waved his hand to disregard that. I turned my hand to look back over to the two girls giggling with each other, as if they had the best kept secret in the world.

"It's okay... you're right anyway." He gave a sad laugh as he brought his knees-up as well. I gave him a sideways glance with a slight frown. "So... what do you plan on doing then?"

"I don't know, Neil. Most likely nothing. I don't know how to react to her... I'm scared to talk to her because I know I'll fall again." I bit the inside of my cheek as I gave him a sad look. After a moment though, he offered me a strange smile as he grabbed my hand, something I didn't expect at all.

"Honey... I'm starting to think you never got back up in the first place." I looked at him as I shook my knee back and forth, feeling him squeeze my fingers. I sighed as I shut my eyes; letting my thoughts drift back to when Jessica and I were kids again.

- Fourteen Years Ago-

We had just entered our fourth year of elementary. Once again, we shared the same class, sitting next to each other. Everyone knew us as simply Jessica and Deanney, but we continued to call each other Dey and Jessy.

No one seemed to fully understand it, but it wasn't meant for them; it was meant for us. Every day, at recess, we'd sit under the huge tree that stood in the middle of grassy play area. She'd read such great stories, like the chronicles of Narnia and some bear book I couldn't remember. I'd lay my head on her lap as she read aloud; her always smiling as she read.

One day, as we laid under the big tree, she closed her book. The noise caused me to open my eyes to see she was looking down at me with an amused look on my face.

"What's the matter?" I had asked her as I angled my head to see her better. She had this unidentifiable look though, and at that age it made no sense to me.

"Nothing, just thinking." She said as she smiled again. My brows furrowed as my young self sat up, looking at her again.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked her as I looked her in the eye. She averted her eyes and chewed on her lower lip. "Come on, you can tell me."

"It's really nothing." She said as she stood up, grabbing her book and offering me a hand. I was confused and frustrated that she was keeping something from me. I grabbed her hand though and let her help me up. I looked down at her, wondering still what could be on her mind. She turned around though and just walked back to class, with me in tow.

- _________________________________________________________________________

As the flashback faded, I recalled another time when she had explained to finally what she had thought about that day. We were fifteen years old as she randomly blurted it out and I will never forget it.

'Do you remember that day under the tree in year four?' She had said as we were cuddled up in a ball together on her bed. I looked at her for moment, trying to remember what she meant. She smiled, 'The day I stopped reading to you and just got up and went to class?'

'Oh yeah, I remember that, why though?' I asked as I traced patterns on her hip. She giggled as she pushed my fingers away.

'Well... I wanted to kiss you.' She said as she pulled away from my embrace to look at me, all seriousness in her eyes. I blinked a few times as I looked at her.

'Really? Why didn't you?' She rolled her eyes and laughed as she fell back into my arms, her face in the crook of my neck. I smiled down at her as I kissed the top of her blonde hair.

"We were only 8 years old. I don't know what that feeling really was at the time, Dey. But, as we grew older, spent more time together... the feeling... never went away. In fact,' she said as she lifted her head up, a strange look in her eye. 'It just made it that much harder not to kiss you. Then... a few months ago... when astro died... I couldn't control my feelings anymore.' She gave me a shy smile as she shrugged her shoulders. 'Is that weird to feel like that at such a young age?'

'No... and I'm glad you finally kissed me. It made me realize how perfect we are for each other.' I smiled up at her as she smiled down at me. I brought her to me, our foreheads touching just before I kissed her. When we pulled away she had a light blush on her face as she smiled with her eyes closed.

'I'm so glad I did it then.'

--------- Back to Present day----------

I sighed as I looked back to Neil, who was staring at me with a knowing look.

"Thinking about her?" He asked as he finished his burger. I looked down at my plate to see I haven't even touched my food.

"When don't I, Neil?" He smiled as he pushed my phone over. The light on the phone lit a bright red, indicating another new text message.

"I believe that's her that texted you as you daydreamed." I swallowed the lump that built in my throat and flipped my phone open. It was her; Land had definitely sent me another text message. I looked at Neil.

Dey;

It's been a couple of days since we last texted. I didn't want to seem creepy or strange if all I did was text you... but I have been thinking a lot about you. I keep having dreams about the two of us. Randomly while sitting in class, I'd get flashbacks of when we were younger and I can't stop smiling.

--- As Always yours, Jessy-----