the inner workings of my mind and soul.

walking to reality i thought was a dream

i roll over and there you are. I didn't expect you to be here. I didn't expect to breathe in your scent in the morning. I thought it was just a dream and I was hoping against hope that it wasn't. I was hoping you were here. I was hoping it wasn't a dream and that when I opened my eyes, there yours would be; there you would be. I was hoping that I would be able to roll closer and closer until I was in your arms and there was no space between us, physically or emotionally. I was hoping I would be able to hear your raspy morning voice and see your sleepy eyes wake up. I wanted to slide my hand in yours and feel you intertwine your fingers with mine. I was hoping you would smile at me and whisper "good morning love." before kissing me until I fully woke up. I was hoping you were here and that it was just a dream so I wouldn't have to wake up to the harsh reality that there is a world without you in it and that is where I currently reside. I wanted so badly for you to be here. I wanted so badly for the morning to be warm again but it wasn't. you weren't there when I rolled over. the first thing I saw wasn't your sleepy eyes and smile. I didn't breathe in your scent. I didn't roll closer and closer to you. I didn't intertwine my fingers with yours. you didn't kiss me good morning because you weren't here that way anymore. you live in my heart always that warmth never leaves me, even though your current residence is somewhere in the clouds not down here with me. it's okay though because I had those mornings and I have the remains of them to help me continue because I have the remains of you always with me, never gone; just like when you were here and the world was a much better place.