Reactions + Imagines | Got7

got7 as sh*t my dad has said

a/n: my dad was born and raised in texas so for maximum effect it is best to read these in a thick texan drawl lolol ;)

↳ mark: now listen to me carefully my child. i have paid my share of taxes and put you through college. i will now recline in my recliner. eat some cheese puffs. watch a little golf. and probably snore a bit until dinner time. under no circumstances am i to be disturbed. i dont care if the stove catches fire. you got two hands. get the water hose.

↳ jaebum: i love your mother. god knows i do. but there are days i think about building a tree house in the middle of the woods. with a moat and gators. and a gaggle of stray cats to keep me company. so i can have just a little peace and quiet. but deep down i know she would hunt me down and yell at me for some random crap i did thirty years ago.

↳ jackson: young lady you are walking on thin eggshells with me. yes i am aware the correct phrases are walking on thin ice or walking on eggshells. but you have reached a new level of sass and stupid i had to improvise. im the sarcasm champion. dont come at me with all that foolishness.

↳ jinyoung: i was in the navy for half my life. i slept in a ship we affectionately called the tin can. i slept like a baby in two hundred foot waves. then i came home and had children. i aint slept since. now dont get me wrong i love yall. but i reckon god has a sense of humor. clearly he gave yall to me as a real test of my patience.

↳ youngjae: lord have mercy. i aint felt this betrayed since the day as a young whippersnapper i learned that pickles are just sour expired cucumbers. that dill nonsense is of the devil. i only keep sweet relish in this house. when you pay your own bills you can have whatever condiments you like.

↳ bambam: well missy i see your bull malarkey and raise you some fried baloney. you sass mouthed turkey. in this house we mind our manners. until your mother leaves. then we do whatever we want. and tuck the crazy back in before she gets home. you know the rules.

↳ yugyeom: look at these pictures of me. whoo i was a handsome ankle biter. a real good looking feller. your mama had no idea what to do with herself. we used to go out dancing and i was the man of the hour. now i have a theory on this. either my dancing was pretty good. or i was so good looking that my mediocre dancing looked good. believe what you want.

(taken from my tumblr: ahgaseda)