Through it all || Amber Riley x Jacquees

Chapter 11

Saturday-

Amber POV...

"So I've edited your song. You wanna hear it" John said it was third day of recording and I'm working on my second song, it's called Myself.

"Yes"

*Play song*

"I remember feeling like I wasn't good enough had me questioning myself I wasn't sure enough had me looking in the mirror trying to analyze my figure I ain't perfect you want perfect so that figures
You always put me in a bad place (oh oh)
Said we were moving at a fast pace (oh ooh oh)
It was all my fault (fault)
I fell in love too hard
I loved you when I didn't love myself (yeah yeah)
Said you loved but you only loved yourself
You wrapped me so hard you played all your cards right
You played with my heart and mind I might not be the same way
You were walking in the door you wasn't saying hi (hi)
You were walking out the door you wasn't saying bye bye (bye bye)
Seems like you only got that way when things didn't go your way (ooh ooh ooh ooh)
How could you claim that you love me and behave this way (mm)
Sometimes I don't know how I survived (survived)
You picked me up and threw me in the sky (sky)
And when I felt you let me hit the ground (oh ooh oh ooh oh)
I still felt alone with you around
I learned my lesson (lesson)
This shit got hectic (hectic)
Look all in all the experience it was a blessing (yeah)
Saw me factious
Lets skip the basics
Seems like you want it all to me fell all sensation
I remember all the lies (I remember all the lies)
All the nights you made me cry (all the nights you made cry
When you controlled my mind
Had me wishing I would die (had me wishing I would die)
You would never know how I hurt (how I feel)
I gave my all to you my love was real baby but you didn't love me (you didn't love me)
I loved you when I didn't love myself
Said you loved but you only loved yourself
You wrapped me so hard you played all your cards right (oh ooh ooh oh)
You played with my heart and mind I might not be the same A"

*End song*

"When did you write this song?"

"A long time ago when I was still in school"

"Who did you write it for?"

"My foster mother"

"Foster?"

"I was their foster child the only one actually"

"How was she?"

"She took me in for the money but papa Riley didn't he was like a real father to me he even convinced Ms Teresa when I was 17 and officially no longer tied to the system to give me their last name. She said I was no Riley but Mr Riley didn't listen to her. She always put me in a bad place I was always depressed I didn't result to suicide or anything because I always told myself I had a future so why end my life now for someone who I didn't see in it"

"This is a powerful song girl... You said she mad you analyze your figure?"

"It's lie nor secret that I'm a big girl but I went on this crazy diet sophomore year because she kept telling me how big I was "you need to lose weight" "your a disgrace" "you make us look bad your No Riley" that's when she said it. I don't care anymore though, but then it did bother me"

"Wow, I didn't know you went through stuff like that"

"It was a lot better then what used to happen to me when I was bounced around constantly"