A Book Of Bullshit I Make Instead Of Sleeping Oops

An RP In A Nutshell

"Write a scene that involves poppies, a telephone, and pink underwear."

i can't actually post these on my phone but i write them at whatever time and then post it later

this bullshit was from 2 am

but it's 7:30 now

based off an rp  

"Starmine, why the fuck are we looking for our boyfriends in a strip club?"

"Because you never know."

"Weren't we originally trying to stop them from killing themselves?"

"Yeah. We found them in a giant cup of tea that we originally thought was an offering to Maple."

Trickster sighed. "Remind me how it went from that to us looking for them in a strip club?"

Starmine clapped his hands together, inhaling sharply, then slowly releasing his breath. "Our ukes ran off after Senbu released a hellish screech that repels all semes and leaves us crying like we got kicked in the balls."

"Was it really that painful?"

"You were there, remember?"

"Oh yeah. It was. I wonder why."

Starmine looked a little shocked. "Dude, he's a Len module and an uke. Do you know how high and loud that child can scream?"

"Actually yeah, when I fuck him. Only problem is he's banned me from fucking him for a while because he says it hurts. He's still thirsty as fuck to suck my balls, but I don't get what he means by sex being painful."

"If I weren't a Len module I'd be questioning your sanity."

"Thanks. Anyway. After we were verbally kicked in the nuts, how come we didn't go after them?"

"Do you have short term memory loss or something? You were with me the entire time!"

"No, this is just SD's lazy exposition. It's lazy to the point we're basically breaking the fourth wall."

"Big oof."

"Yup. So why didn't we go after them?"

"Mostly to avoid getting ear raped again and also because Senbu and Dark are the most terrifying Len modules along with Ayasaki."

"That is very true. Lancer is also quite terrifying, but in a different way. Very... touchy-feely."

Starmine shuddered. "Yeah, I keep my distance from him. Plus I think Hansel likes Aitetsu. Not for anything sexual, just... I dunno."

"Fluff?"

"Exactly."

"Okay but seriously how the fuck did we go from crying on the ground to here?"

"After we recovered we decided to play checkers except we didn't know how to play checkers so we went on some huge ass quest to find out the rules. Punkish was being fucked against the front door of the Len mansion from inside the building so we couldn't get in and it's the only proper entrance or exit. Instead, you flew me up to a window and we broke into Senbu's room because he has a computer. Then the problem was that neither of us knew how to turn on the computer because you're a weird demon thing with elf ears that eats dreams and tricks people into giving you their dreams so you turn their world monochrome and I'm a healthy child who spends all my time outdoors and I have an odd obsession with fireworks but due to my lack of screen time I have no fucking clue how to work a laptop."

"They're not elf ears, they're Baku ears!"

"Nobody gives a fuck. We tried saying a word that Senbu is obsessed with to see if the laptop would open and it did. The word was Trickster-sama as expected and Senbu's desktop for some reason is a picture of your dick that you had no prior knowledge of."