Never meant to || fillie

Don't need you.

Bel is asleep upstairs and Millie and I are catching up. It's still a bit uncomfortable but not as much as I expected.
"I think I hear them pulling up"
Noah, Gaten , Caleb, Liz and Sadie all pile out of Noah's car.
"Hey where's you bodyguard?"
" forgot to pick up food for the cook out so he went to the store to pick some up, shouldn't take long ."
" good because we're starving" I say hi to the party and we all head back inside where we find Millie sitting on the floor next to Isabel.
" you guys finally made it"
I look over at bel and I can't stop smiling. I just can not believe I have a daughter. A beautiful baby girl who I have the whole day to get to know.
"Hey Bel, you want to come with me to make you some hot cocoa!"
With out saying a word she jumps out of Millie's grasp and runs to my side sliding her little hand into mine. Her skin is so soft and warm. With a promise to come back for hot cocoa for all, Bel and I both head into the kitchen.
" so Isabel, I wanted to play a game with you?"
" what kind of game"
" well since we don't really know anything about each other, how about we ask each other questions. I ask one and then you ask one. Sound like a plan?"
"Yeah!" She gives me a high five and we start with basic questions. What's your favorite color she kept changing it saying she loves them all , favorite song said she couldn't pick a favorite but she loves Daya, What grade is she in she's in pre kinder What kind of toys does she like dolls. Any kind of dolls. Does not matter what kind.
I tried asking her her birthday but she said she didn't remember and she asked me mine and said I was really old when I told her . 
The girls then come in holding grocery bags. Millie walks towards Bel and gives her a kiss on her head and goes around me to grab some boards and knifes.
" do you two want to stay and help or do you want to go with the guys?" Sadie asks as I hand her and Lizzie two cups.
" I'll help you guys here for a bit if that's ok"
Bel sits on the counter and we keep asking each other questions. The other join sometimes to answer and ask questions too."
" do you help people, too? Like mommy?"
" Id like to think that in a way I do."
" what do you do?"
" Im in a band. We write and play music. Like Daya except there's 4 of us instead of 1"
" really, that's so cool."
I glaze at Millie for a second and I see her face drop for a second. I know there's still a lot to be said but I really want to enjoy this moment with my daughter.
" hey Isabel I'm going to take these cups to your uncles. You want to join me?"
" her your guards with them.. by the way does he have a name?"
" oh yeah uh I call him Doug. But his names Douglas."
We walk out to the back where we see the boys standing next to an already lit grill.
" Finally we've been waiting on that hot cocoa for decades little miss"
" sorry guys Isabel and I got fought up in asking each other questions."
" yeah, daddy told em he plays music. Like Daya!"
"Who's Daya?"
" oh wow!"  Both Gaten and Caleb day at the same time.
" your dad is in one of the best bands there is! They play all over the world for so many people." Doug walks towards Isabel and puts his arm out to skate her hand.
" whoa! Who are you mister?"
" I'm a friend of your dad's. I make sure he's ok and now I'll make sure you are to." Just by him saying that brings thought to my mind of her not being ok. Being a celebrity can be scary at times and I don't want her to ever go through any of it. Millie and I agree on one thing and that is to keep her out of the spotlight. I know the word will get out that I have a daughter, I can't stop that. But I can stop them from photographing her.
" dad you go all around the world?"
" yeah I get to meet a lot of people."
" hey maybe he'll take you one day?"
An innocent comment that might just ruin it all. Millie is coming out as Noah tells Isabel that maybe one day she's join me. By the look on her face I can tell she's not happy about the comment.
" Noah."
" mommy! Daddy said he can take me all over the world with him!"
" oh, is that so? Well isn't that wonderful Isabel why don't you go inside with Sadie . It's getting cold  and Finn, could I have a word with you please."
One little innocent comment. That's all it took.
" what are you doing? Why are you trying to take her from me?"
" what? I'm not trying anything. Doug told her that I travel and get to meet a lot of people and then Noah said that maybe one day she could join me."
" I don't want her in the public eye!"
" Noah didn't mean anything by it millie. God don't take this too seriously. I don't want her in the media either. I know how stressful it can having people watch your every move and I don't want that for her."
" good because I won't allow it.look I don't have a problem with you getting to know her but I don't want her to get to attached."
" too attached? What the hell are you saying? Of course she is going to get attached Millie I'm her dad!"
"Yeah her dad that won't be in her life most of the time because he's probably doing a show in London or Japan."
"What does me doing shows have to do with any of this?"
" Finn she needs stability in her life. You coming in and out of it isn't healthy for her."
" then I'll move back home-"
"And have people find out who she is?"
" what do you want from me Millie? I can't do this, you have to tell me what you need me to do!"
" I need you to leave."
"What?"
I shake my head a bit to try to process what she said and I notice we were outside alone now. All our friends went inside to the living room where we know they can still hear us.
" she's just met you and I know she'll get over this. You coming here was not a good idea."
" nothing you say can make me leave." It was not a mistake. It was the best decision I've ever made. She looks at me with so much hate in her eyes so much anger.
" go. My life fell apart the moment you left. And it finally got to a point where I can live happily and here you are again destroying everything I built! You've been nothing but a burden to me and I rather die than have you mess up my daughters life." Tears stream down both our cheeks and the rest of my world goes numb. I've never meant to hurt her. I just wanted a chance to get to know my daughter .
"Millie I-"
"No! I don't want to hear it. You already have a perfect life with a perfect girlfriend waiting for you. You have nothing of yours here. We don't need you here. Just. Go."
I just wanted her to be happy but I can't let her take Isabel from me.
" I won't give up on her. You kept her from me for too long."
" GO!"
I give on last look as I head inside. I know I shouldn't leave like this but she doesn't want me here and I don't want to put Isabel through any of this. The guys try to stop me from leaving but it's no help. She wants me gone. I get in the truck and leave right away. She doesn't want me near her. I don't know where I'm going but I'm not really paying attention. I keep thinking about how one small comment can lead to this. To her telling me she wants me go- .....

Nine one one what's your emergency?

!!! Im mad because my boyfriend surprised me with calpurnia tickets like a week ago for tonight but I DIDN'T GO BECAUSE I HAVE THE FUCKING FLU  BECAUSE THE WEATHER KEEPS CHANGING !!

Oh and hope you like this. Also have an idea for two books! Be on the look out for those . Love y'all 🥰