Never meant to || fillie

My boy

There are places I remember
All my life
though some have changed
Some forever, not for better
Some have gone and some remain

"Finn? Oh god Finn you woke- oh god. Nurse! Nurse!! Mrs. Wolfhard, he's awake! Oh baby I missed you!"

All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I've loved them all

"Stephanie what is go- Finn? Oh Finn. Sweet heart I- mommy's here baby. I'm here"

But of all these friends and lovers
There is no-one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new

" welcome back baby brother. God I fucking missed you, you little shit, come here."

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more

"Dammit Finn, don't ever do this to us again. Almost gave your old man a heart attack. I love you so much son."

In my life I love you more.

My names... Finn?

According to all these people hugging me and crying. I know them. I know I know them but I just- it's like they're a vague memory of a distant dream I once had. But I know I care for them. They're my family.

From what I can understand, the tall blonde that ran out of the room is my most likely a girlfriend.

This sweet lady caressing my cheeks is my mom. She has such a comforting look on her face. It's red and puffy, but it's still so comforting. I like the thought of the being my mom.

That guy behind her that kind of looks like me I'd have to guess is my brother. He looks more nervous than the rest.
And the gentle giant who I really want to hug is my dad. He looks so relived. It breaks my heart to know I hurt them.

But how did I hurt them?

Why am I here?

Something in the way she moves
Attracts me like no other lover

"Finnlard, you asshole. Fucking love you buddy"

Something in the way she woos me
I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe her how

" good to know our favorite rockstar is going to be ok."

Somewhere in her smile she knows
That I don't need no other lover

"This was the biggest beep beep, Richie. I'm happy you're ok, Finn."

Something in her style that shows me
I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe her how

"Of course he's ok! That Finn fucking Wolfhard!"

You're asking me will my love grow
I don't know I don't know

"Coolest dude to ever live. Thank you for being ok."

You stick around now it may show
I don't know I don't know

" hey guys, the rooms getting a little crowded and there's still two lovely ladies who needs to see him."

Something in the way she knows

"Where's Millie anyway. I thought she was just going home for a bit. Has anyone called her? "

And all I have to do is think of her

"Ill call her and I'll go get Isabel. Be right back."

Something in the things she shows me

" Dad!"

I don't want to leave her now

Mary

"Dad? I'm a- what's going on here. Why am I here?why is- I'm not a dad!"
Confusing and horror are evident as he pulls away from Isabel and stares deep into my eyes.
" honey, it's Isabel. You're babygirl."
" look , kid. I don't know what's going on but Im- I'm not a dad."
"Dad?"
" I'm not your dad kid, I'm sorry."
" Nick, go get the doctor." I don't blame him for standing there with the look on his face but I just need to figure out what's wrong with my boy. I need to know how to help him.
" Now Nick!"
Isabel, although very scared, walks a little closer to Finn and tries to hold his hand.
"But you are my dad. Mommy said-"
But Finn yanks it away as soon as she touches it.
" Dammit kid how many times do I have to say I'm not your father!, your mom's a fucking liar."
" Finn! Don't you dare yell at-"
" get the fuck out of here. All of you."
" hey man calm down."
" don't tell me to fucking calm down just get the fuck out, ok? I want to be alone"
"We just wa-"
" I said out!"
Gaten picks up Isabel who's now full blown crying and Sadie walks behind her reassuring her everything will be ok.

One by one they all quickly pile out of the room.

" I said out." He says but he doesn't look me in the eye despite me chasing his gaze.
" I know you know who I am. So if you want to yell at me that's fine. But I'm you're mother. You were so close to leaving me. I was so close to losing you Finn. I just- I'm not leaving. The doctor will be here soon, ok? We'll wait together."

"While we We're attending to the head Injury, the brain began to swell. There were many possible effects due to this. Finn suffers from memory loss. When his brain swelled up, it affected his temporal lobe, which is the area of the brain that helps control your emotions and store some of your long term memory."

" he. Um. He lost his memory for ever."

" you can help jog it back. Show him pictures. Tell him stories. It will take a long time and if I'm being honest, he might not fully be himself again."

Flashes of my little boy running up to me after school, telling me a joke he heard in class, come rushing in.
My sweet boy who just wants to make music to make people happy.
My beautiful baby boy is hurting and there's not a lot I can do.
" he'll be ok. There's no other option."

I don't want to lie... it'll definitely get a lot worse but just remember that I love y'all ❤️

Also Texas weather can go suck a Texas sized D***. I'm tired of wearing shorts one day and a fucking fur coat the next.